everyday....

I heard this rumor..

2011-03-13T21:08:00.001-07:00

So once upon a time, in a land far, far away, lived a girl who had too much time on her hands, and too much to say. So the girl had this idea that she should blog. And so she did. Lo and behold, some people were actually reading said blog. And then, as luck would have it, the girl ran out of things to say! As if!

So a few weeks ago, I was talking to one of my friends on twitter (yet another social media thing that I got super into, and then abandon here and there), and we got to talking about our blogs, and why we havent updated them lately. You see, she hasn't updated hers in about as long as me. Now this isn't a direct quote, but she said her reason was something along the lines of, "I dont have anything happy to write about". I told her, I know EXACTLY what you mean!

Honestly though, I'm not saying I'm depressed everyday all day. But, life isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Things get tough, and then I don't know, I like shrink away from all my social networking. I go into hibernation. And I really hate that i do that. I think about how much the Internet helped me when I was a sahm; it was my connection to the world. And then here I am, slamming the door in it's face when life gets hard. Some friend I am. Pshht.

Or you know, it could be that I'm just too lazy to blog (: Yeah. It's probably just that. But I miss it. I lay in bed at night with all these awesome things to blog. And then don't do it. Like, how Olivia has turned into a mini me. And how I really think our dog needs a friend. Like maybe a Boston terrier. Or that theeee cutest wedges at forever21 and can't wait to show them to the world. See. It goes on and on.

Miss you cyber world.
Xoxo
Me

another day in paradise

2010-11-15T18:57:00.001-07:00

Aka..mommy guilt.
Gotta story. Wanna hear it? Here it goes.

On Thursday, Art and I will be celebrating 10 years of marriage. Whoa. Did I just type that? Shit. I'm old! Anyways..since it happens to fall on a Thursday, we haven't had any luck in getting a sitter. So we planned on doing brunch and a movie Friday while the kids are at school. Good idea, yes? Well....

Last night after sending the kids to bed, Maya had come to find me--she had a paper in her hand. She tells me she had forgotten to give me the paper earlier. So I take it from her and kinda scan it. Immediately I knew what it was, and it broke my heart. A field trip to Kingsbury Hall to watch a play of Frog and Toad; Mayas favorite favorite characters from her favorite books. Cue puppy dog eyes and her sweet little voice "momma can you pweeese come wiff me?".
Argh. I'm a sucker for the eyes. The sweet baby voice; she is still my baby after all. I scootch her off to bed, and with my head hanging low, I go to relay the news to Art. Of course he has this brilliant idea that we should both go on the field trip. Make it a date. While I think its sweet, I didn't quite imagine spending our anniversary with so many kids!

So tonight I sat Maya down and explained the situation. She paid very close attention, nodding along as I explained why it was a special day for daddy and I. Then when I'm done, I asked her what she thought. So she took a deep breath and said " I think you should spend your anniversary with daddy". And then it happened. The biggest, wettest crocodile tear this side of the Mississippi. SIGH. She is good.

So, here I sit, still not knowing what to do. Break my daughters heart...or spend my anniversary in the company of at least a hundred 2nd graders?

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°missing you°

2010-11-14T16:16:00.001-07:00

I seem to have nothing to say anymore. I have used the excuse of not having some kind of app for my phone to make it easier to do. Which, I'll admit, if I had an app, I would probably consider blogging more. I've even considered switching to tumblr. But then I realized I'm probably not cool enough to use it. I wish that turning on my computer didn't seem like such a task, but it does. Maybe it's because my PC is a senior citizen and only really works well when its a full moon on the 6th Sunday of the 13th month. Maybe I'm exaggerating a bit. But it does definitely *feel* like its a chore. I can't remember the last time I actually used the computer for anything--seems my phone is taking the brunt of the workload. Its always nearby and usually pretty fast...and I'm lazy. So yeah. An app for my phone would be immensely helpful. Maybe I should learn how to write codes and make an app myself.. hmm. Yeah not gonna happen. Remember how I said I'm lazy? It always gets in the way of all my good ideas.

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rAnDoMs

2010-08-07T14:32:00.001-07:00

-shutting down this blog. do I or dont I? I dont update nearly as much as I used to. I mean to, but dont seem to make time for it. I like that I have had this blog for so long and I can go back and read old entries and pictures--and even better, I can read comments that my mom left forever ago. thank you internets for being so awesome!

-should I grow my hair out or keep it short. yes, I know this is a super important topic that you are all waiting with bated breath to hear about. I like short hair because I think its more flattering for my chubby face. and I like short styles. But then I think that I havent had long hair in a really, really long time. and then I ponder, self, maybe you're too old for long hair! is there a time frame for something like that? I dont mean long like to my butt crack. just to like my shoulders or a little past. hmm.

-do I look ghetto/stripper-esque with my zebra print acrylic nails? probably. not sure if I care or not though. I think I like them enough to do it again.

-why does my hairstylist refuse to call me back? I love her so and really dont want to find a new person.

-missing my crafty-ness. I think about it daily. and then move on to something else. sigh.

-on that note, I'm looking forward to Craft Lake City this month so I can oogle all the other people getting their craft on. and then be jealous of said crafting. and of course I'll say things like 'Ooh! I could totally make that!' and then never think of it again.

-feeling guilty because my dog is home alone all day. PS: the last job situation I mentioned did NOT last. so not surprised by that. I was the walking dead. on to greener pastures with just one job which I'm loving. so YAY (:

-sad that I dont really get to do BTS shopping. am I the only parent out there that actually LIKES buying new clothes and shoes for my kids? I mean, I do get to buy them new stuff, but its not cute in the least because they have to wear uniforms.. and olivia totally hates that. she is dying to to get some new trendy clothes. I could buy them anyway and she could wear them on the weekend. but thats so not the point.

-thinking about buying a new car and art and I just cant agree: car or truck?

I say car, because we would probably get better gas mileage from a car than a truck.

He says truck because then we could haul stuff around. (my thought: What stuff is this that needs hauling around?) I mean, we have somehow survived the last, I dont know, like 9 years without needing stuff hauled. And then he says what about when his mom needs stuff hauled? So then of course I counter with, 'You want to buy a truck in case your mom needs something moved?' LOL. see, this debate will never end.

**and this my friends, is the reason I am not sleeping at night. Well, okay. there are other things that I think about too. like I forgot to buy poptarts for the kids to have for breakfast. and that I need to get my dog a new chew toy for being so good all day. and what should we have for dinner for the rest of the week? do the kids need laundry done? do I?

the stupid list never ends.

xoxo,

monica

Finally..

2010-05-24T00:36:00.001-07:00

-who knew that it would still be freezing rain in the middle of may? Or is it the end of may now? Such awesome Utah weather.

-whats new? Well recently started a second job. Pay Is great. But lets be honest: I'm lazy. So Its very very questionable how long I'll be able to keep up this charade. I currantly work outside the home from 6pm to 12am..then come home and work until 2:30am, get the kids up for school at 7, then work till about 9 or 10am..then nap. Eat. Shower. Repeat.

-kids have like two weeks left of school. Can't decide if I'm excited or not lol

-i have a huge summer wishlist building up. One of those is a trampoline for the kidlets. Figure its been awhile since we've had any broken bones around here and we should do something about that. Ha!

-another list that keeps growing much to my chagrin is household items that need replaced. Like the water heater that is temperamental and will only heat up or stay lit when it feels like it. I think it has pms. Then the dryer decided it was going to strike as well and not turn. Awesome. Then today the lawnmower joined the union. Thankfully after the front was mowed. However the backyard is still a jungle. I told Art that it probably stopped working because it was pissed off for not being used often enough. :p

-funny thing that happened this weekend; took the kids to the living traditions festival, lots of fun free stuff to do. We were walking around after Olivia had gotten a henna tattoo (which she was annoyed with because she kept getting her sleeve in it) and I hear her say "that's nice. That's REAL nice." I turn around to see why she's being so snarky -- then I see it. Bird poop. On her shoulder. I laughed. And laughed. Which in turn caused her to cry and tell me that she was ready to go home. Now. Lol. I only was laughing at her comment. Oh well. She survived.

-the pictures are from Saturday after they made some Mexican paper flowers. Olivia refused to smile. Per usual. Le sigh.

Xoxo
Monica

.broken hearts suck ass.

2010-04-16T10:22:00.000-07:00

i need to ramble. i've contemplated about whether or not i should i blog about this. its been on my mind and heart for a long time. i've wanted to talk about it. i need to talk about it. get it off my chest and just out there. but i think art just doesnt understand. or maybe he does, but cant comfort me in the way i need. my mom would understand. she would know the right thing to say. she always did, even if wasnt really words, just quiet understanding.

i've recently lost someone close to me. maybe thats not the right wording. no one died, but a relationship did...so i guess i'm mourning that the way i would as if someone had passed. i lost my bff. people change. priorities. differences happen. it stung. shocked me. i felt that i had found my person. she WAS my person. is. i dont think i've been this hurt over a friendship..well..ever.

it was me. it was her. it doesnt matter.. the only relevent thing is that i've felt lost since then. i second guess everything i say and do. i question whether or not i'm being nice, supporting and encouraging or even friendly enough to the people in my life.. i worry that i keep my mouth shut when really i should be supporting--i worry i shouldnt be supporting or giving advice, and that i should just mind my own business. but then i feel weird for being so quiet. everything feels all wrong. i've never worried about what i said or how i react to things so much before; i'm so self conscience now. i have no self esteem. i feel like i'm not worthy of being friends with anyone. this one person, my bestie--she knew me better than anyone in the world, probably better than i knew myself. i cant help but feel that because of that, who i am, that that is the reason we are no longer friends. i have been shaken to my very core. i am re-thinking everything, how i dress, what i find funny, who i spend time with, where i go..how i speak, what i think. i miss her. i miss us. i am lonely and sad all too often. and i remember once again what is like having to make new friends again. how hard it is as an adult, trying so hard to be accepted. hoping that someone will see something in me that they will like and fearing they wont see anything at all that is appealing to them. i hate this. self loathing. this isnt me, but yet i can think of nothing else. sometimes i tell myself its like that saying, that people are in your life sometimes for a reason or season, or whatever gay thing it says. you know which one i'm talking about? anyways. i've been having a hard time adjusting. not having that one person i can spill everything to. good things and bad. that person i can let my guard down with, and just be silly and goofy..its thrown me off. but i'm hopeful. i'm hopeful that i will find myself again, and maybe not be too worried about how others see me. true friendship. i'm positive i'll find it again.

xoxo

always playing catch up

2010-02-03T11:12:00.000-07:00

-its not as if i lead an ultra exciting and busy life. because i dont. i think its pretty average. yet, i'm still unable to bring myself to pull up my chair and write my thoughts down for a few minutes. and in all actuality, i'm already sitting here, usually working, so its not like i'd be going out of my way, turning on the computer, etc. ah well. what counts is that, today, i'm blogging..so the let the updating commence!

-art lost his job about a month ago. totally shocked. kinda still am. but, it might just have a silver lining. we've been talking about him going to school, which is always a good thing.

-i chopped all of mayas beautiful waist length hair off--to just above her shoulders. i was really terrified that she was going to regret it the second i cut it; she's so wishy washy sometimes, the way only 7 year old girls can be. anyways, she LOVES it. phew!

exhibit A:

i think it came out super cute, and i think it kinda reminds me of Selena Gomez' hair when she went short, no?

-been purging a ton of my scrapbook stuff. again. and this time, its actually really going to leave my house. yay! the awesome thing about purging, is that it makes me miss being crafty. i miss getting paint and glue all over me. and seeing bits of papers all over the floor. i miss it, so therefore, i am trying to get back into it. i even did like 3 pages in one night. i think i even almost forgot how to use my scanner. that was an adventure, hehee.

-on the note of scrapbooking, is my mom, of course. i dont think i ever realized just how much she influenced me. always cheering me on, and exclaiming over my accomplishments, gushing about how cute the girls were, noting where she could see improvements in my craft of the moment. she was amazing. she made me feel amazing. and good. i think it just now really hit me as i'm typing this; i did it for her as much as i was doing it for myself. maybe she was just being a good mom by complimenting me, and egging me to do more. whatever it was, it worked. and now i dont seem to find the same joy in creating as i did before. sounds pretty vain, now that i'm typing it. i guess its the truth though. i always loved knowing that she loved looking at all the silly pictures i take of the girls, or showing her my latest page. i loved her input, and now its gone, so now i just dont even try. which means i havent taken many pictures in the last year and a half. bottom line i'm trying to get through to myself, via this post--i miss my mom. i dont want to scrapbook things she has missed. its my way of making time stand still. everytime i glue a photo to paper, i think of her. so maybe, i'm really just robbing myself of memories...hmm. food for thought, yes.

-so, for those of you out in blogland, this IS still a scrapbooking blog. i promise. i still love the craft, the art, the passion. its still in me.

xoxo

monica

so..

2009-12-11T11:23:00.000-07:00

-i tried to blog from my phone. had this nifty little app, thought it would save me time. i could blog in bed! while i'm making dinner! i thought, man, that would be rad. because then i could blog all the time. well, maybe not all the time, but more than 3x a year LOL
..but apparantly, it doesnt like me to try post photos. and i dont like blogging without them. i feel like my posts are way more exciting when there is something else to look at besides words...so back to the drawing board, i guess.

-actually might send out xmas cards this year. maybe. my friend, katie, is responsible for this. did you know that you can do photo cards at walmart? who knew?? i mean, for the last 2 weeks i've been flip flopping on designs at picnik, as well as some i had for photoshop. but i just wasnt digging any of them. and then voila! her's arrived in my mailbox..and there ya have it. my cards are designed, easy peasy. so maybe, just maybe, you'll get one., you know, *if* i have your address, and *if* i actually can find my stamps. heres what it might look like if you do get one:

-oh, and i was definitely lazy about this. as if waiting until like 2 weeks before xmas to order cards is no indication..we didnt even have time to take a photo of all 4 of us, in the same pic, at the same time. yeah i know. i'm rad. dont hate. anyways, had to do a compilation of photos i already had..except for the one of me and art. do you know the last picture of art and i together is from about..i dont know, 4 years ago?? geez. and we've never taken a formal family photo either. yep. thats right. NEVER.

-also, related, is that i havent started xmas shopping. i mean, why do it now, when i can wait until the last 2 days. that way most of what my kids want is sold out..so my choices are made for me, i just buy whatever is left! hahaha. totally kidding. i think i actually do a better job at last minute shopping, i think. and my kids are never disappointed. except maybe this year they might be. they both want DSi's. personally, i dont think they are responsible enough yet. i mean, i had a DS, and maya used to stand on it. yes, you read that right. opened up, STANDING on it. i'm not paying $179 for a STEP. hell no. i am contemplating caving and buying a Wii though. this way we can all play. oh, hell, who am i kidding? i'm so translucent, of course i just want it for me :) especially since they have that new 'old' mario out. and its 4 players, so see, maybe i'll play with the kids. if they're good. and they're room is clean. maybe.

anyways..thats all for me. i'm supposed to be working. ssssh. dont tell on me!
xoxo
monica

It was winter...

2009-12-05T11:28:00.001-07:00

*so far, I'm loving that it hasn't snowed much. It did a little a couple weeks ago..but it melted pretty quickly.

*speaking of seasons, why do leaves have to fall off trees?? Its damn torture raking that crap up. Luckily, I only had to do our front yard because art has a leaf vacuum. Its Rad.

*Mayas 7th birthday is in a couple weeks. I can't believe my baby is growing up.. and she only wants a dsi. And dolls. And a giant doll house. That's all though. Haha.

*thinking I might actually send out Xmas cards this year. I know shocking. And, I might even put up our tree soon..ya know instead of waiting until 2 days before Xmas.

That's all I got.
Xoxo,
Monica

such a slacker

2009-11-20T13:30:00.009-07:00

*first off, my regrets for not posting more frequently. blogging seems to have taken the back burner lately.

*the kids are still alive. and kicking. and screaming. and giggling.

*art and i just had our 9 year anniversary on wednesday. holy cow i'm old!!

:::anyways heres a small recap of the goings on in the gonzalez household:::

*spent some time here enjoying the scenery

*also did the obligatory photo with pumpkins while at gardner village

*and the kids dressed up all scary for halloween..but i didnt upload those photos LOL
maybe next time :D

xoxo

randoms..

2009-09-21T14:39:00.003-07:00

--i really love this picture i took at the fair. not so much the bald dude with sunglassess, but whatevs.

--how i know i'm old:: the last few times i drank, admittedly too much..it now takes me 2-3 days to recover. ouch. PS:: tequila=no bueno

--currently obsessed with nail polish, specifically sephora by opi's metro chic. <3

but i also love lincoln park after dark.

--so excited about fall being just around the corner. makes me want to cook and bake and clean the house. i think art is probably excited about this prospect as well. heehee.

--saw boys II men in concert last friday. they sound exactly.the.freaking.same. wth? then they went on to say that they've been together for 19 years. wha?? yeah. like i needed another reminder about just how old i am. sheesh. yes, i did take pictures. and a video. and they all suck ass. i hate my camera. i have *one* picture that might be freaking legible. wait, is that the right word? who knows. anyway, i'll post those next time i blog. so..like in 2 months lol.

--also, i've been doing some fall window shopping. ahh.. how i love to spend money. however, i'm going to try to be very, very good and not get too much new stuff. we'll see. i'm trying to tell myself that i need want what i have and not what i dont. i know theres some kind of like saying thats like that. but i cant think of it off hand. you get the idea.

--and since i'm trying to be all like budget wise and shizz, i'll maybe do a post of my favorite fall findings again. like i did with the spring stuff. only because i need a reason to blog :D

xoxo

once a year..

2009-09-11T07:53:00.006-07:00

went to the fair yesterday..here is what we did:

-had pizza, philly cheesesteak, hot dogs, churros, slurpees, deep fried twinkies & caramel apples

-watched the girls having a blast inside all the fun houses and sliding down ginormous slides

saw the strangest things ever, thanks to art, who indulged me and actually paid for me to see all of it =)

*worlds smallest woman (really just a dwarf. with dreads. i was disappointed. i dont know what i expected though)

*worlds smallest horse (a pony? lol. the sign said it was only 10inches tall when it was born. hmph.)
*a snake with a head of a beautiful girl (hahaha. yeah right. it was an old lady with a head sticking out of a platform. no snake body. oh yeah, and i think she smoked. her voice was really raspy, and the girls were too afraid to talk to her hahahaha)

*2 nosed cow (yes , really)

*6 legged steer

*2 headed cat (in a jar. gross.)

anyways..a good time was had by all..and my feet still hurt. and the sham wow guy..there is almost always the same hot british guy there. yeah..not this year :( i was sad. and didnt buy any this time lol.

xoxo

i know, i know.

2009-09-09T19:41:00.002-07:00

*i'm a horrible blogger. i can admit that. and admitting it is half the battle, right?

*summer went too fast. so many things i still didnt get to do..like, camping. i tried to convince art. but he wasnt feeling it. maybe next year?

*cut my hair. colored it. had to get rid of the purple. i mean, i'm so 3008 and that hair was so 2008. hehe. so yeah. now, my hair is black on top..red on the bottom. and i have super short fringe-y bangs. love it. makes me feel kinda fresh, modern. its nice.

*been playing with www.rollip.com love it. almost as much as i love www.picnik.com
almost. but..i guess it would help if i took some damn pictures every once in while.

*speaking of which..i'm contemplating going to the sb expo. yeah i said sb expo. i mean, i havent scrapped since like, what, february? so what.

*something random: i often blog in my head at night, when i'm supposed to be going to sleep. i have all these rad things to blog..and then yeah. the next day, not so much. what gives?
i wish i had something witty or interesting to talk about it. but yeah...nope.

until next time..
xoxo

dedicated to you, mom

2009-08-02T15:32:00.002-07:00

one year ago today, you left this world. left all the pain and hurting behind. i've dreaded this day, for weeks..maybe months. the thoughts of you lying there, hurting, and there was nothing i could do, but to hold your hand and whisper i love you's in your ear. let you know that you werent alone.

i contemplated making a list of things that you've missed in this year that youve been gone. but i decided against it. this is a list of things that will forever remind me of you--whether they are movies, sayings or smells. you're always with me.

*the smell of your hair (pantene)
*the color green
*the ocean
*13 going on 30
*bon jovi
*playing air guitar and drums while jamming out to poison's 'talk dirty to me'
*willy wonka
*cher
*refrigerated ding dongs
*terms of endearment
*my hands
*sunday night pot roast
*tuna fish with pickles
*xmas fudge and popcorn balls
*steel magnolias
*yellow vw bugs
*big fluffy clouds
*merle norman makeup
*sayings like 'tushie, mommala, bubba,oy vey, the bomb, oh my god!, jesus christ!, its all good
*scrapbooking, painting ceramics, making handmade soaps
*yard/garage sales
*chai teas on lazy sundays
*the tv show roseanne
*feathered bangs (took me years to convince you to change your style!)
*online contests, ads and games (you were always a sucker for free stuff)
*the smell of coffee brewing
*tone soap
*bobs big boy
*pink sugar perfume (the only kind you ever liked me to wear because it didnt bother your asthma)
*girly girl time with olivia and maya. a daily tradition you started with the girls, that i try to continue with them

i hope that you are peaceful..that you are enjoying watching the girls grow up, that you are with your mom; i hope you know that you are missed every second of the day.
LGP 12/30/58-08/02/08

xoxo

'member? you 'member!

2009-07-30T14:29:00.003-07:00

*turned 31 last week. or as i like to call it "the one year anniversary of my 30th bday"

*had a fabulous party that art threw for me. it was a sort of surprise. sort of.

*i 'member parts of it. some i dont. thats how you know i had a good time :D

it took me until monday to feel normal. damn jello shots and pineapple vodka. oh yeah..and that empty stomach of mine.

*i got every single thing i wanted for my bday. yes, i'm spoiled. and by everything single thing, i mean that everyone i wanted at my party, showed up. i am loved :)

*speaking of ppl i love that came to my party: miss marissa is one of them. love her to bits. and i miss her already.

*also, on an unrelated note: sunday morning/afternoon we discovered that our toilet seat was broken. another sign that the party was great, i think.

*um..lets see. my hair is still purple..but it still doesnt photograph well as witnessed below:

its way brighter in person. lame.

*i really dig blogging bullet style. so much easier than forming actual paragraphs. i mean, who does that anyway?

xoxo

monica

things on my mind as of late

2009-07-21T22:29:00.001-07:00

*this summer is going by too fast. scratch that. this entire year is.

*olivia turned 8, yet is acting 18. pffft.

*im missing my mom more than ever.

*the one year anniversary of my 30th bday is just days away..

*this time of year is proving more difficult than i expected. or its exactly what i expected.

*i miss scrapbooking, yet cant bring myself to do anything about it. it hurts too much to put down on paper everything that my mom has missed this year.

*being a dog owner is rewarding and sweet..but also annoying, 24/hr maintenence. im lazy..so you can imagine how much i enjoy being at sugar's beckon call.

*i desperately want a new phone, yet dont want to pay for it. specifically the mytouch 3g. its identical software wise, yet waaaaay hotter than my g1. as an aside, why why why cant tmobile have 3g in my area?? ps: thank god for wi-fi.

*addicted to watching makeup tutorials on youtube.
*also addicted to MAC. its sad that the girls at the nordies counter know carolyn and i when we go in.

*seriously considering taking makeup artist classes next year.

*part of my hair is a bright purple, would love to post pics, yet my camera doesnt think thats a good idea.

*playing freecell before i go to sleep seems to help me wind down. i find this strange.

xoxo,
monica

stuff..

2009-06-15T19:40:00.001-07:00

finally updating. i know. sorry its taken so long...but i'm a procrastinator extreme!

*we got a new doggie. her name is sugar, and she's a cocker spaniel. super loveable and sweet..and super teething. but shes great with the kids :)

*maya graduated from kindergarten! it was a really cute program, of which we missed most of due to other inconsiderate parents :P

*olivia is officially a 3rd grader! omg. where has the time gone??

*11 is the number of days until olivia is 8. shoot me now. i'm so ooooooold.

*working at home again, full time. shoot me 2x. because i'm now home with 2 kids, 1 puppy and i'm trying to actually work on top of that?? yeah..we'll see who actually survives the summer ahahahaha.

*sims3 now rules most of my free time. so rad.

*no scrapbooking lately. its too hard. its a hard time of year. everytime i try..it just reminds me that she's gone. i have a hard time even wanting to photograph anything..making memories without her=heartbreaking :(

*blogging in list form is actually easier than forming real sentences. i must remember that the next time i update :)

xoxo

p.s.... i apologize for the craptactular photos..i'm too damn lazy to edit them (see list above ^^ as to how i spend free time now)

uhh..what? warning..long story

2009-05-18T09:20:00.006-07:00

so on wednesdays, we've been watching my nephew play baseball at the park by our house. its been really fun(i think i love the hot dogs and fries the best), and its nice to do something fun with the kids during the week. anyways, so we're sitting in the bleachers, watching the game, when all of a sudden there is this ginormous crash--definitely a car accident. btw, we live on a super duper busy street, so accidents happen here and there. but when I heard it, I was like, omg, that sounds like its right in front of our house! so art goes running out to the street to check out, and comes back. says he didnt see anything.

so we go on watching the game. about a half hour later I decide its time for me to go home and start dinner, so I bring the kids with me so they could get ready to shower as well. typically, I go in our front door, but for some reason when we left, we used the back door, so thats where I went. I get inside, I'm making dinner(tacos), and watching the very last episode of Friends..which I havent seen since the original airing years ago--so I'm totally enthralled in watching Rachel and Ross get back together lol. Olivia comes running 0ver and tells me there is someone at the door, which I didnt hear bc the tv was up loud; so its my neighbor. He speaks spanglish--which I'm not too fluent in. He's asking if we are okay, and then points to the street saying something about an accident. I tell him, that yes we're fine, we'd heard the accident, but didnt see anything. at this point, I'm kinda confused, bc we werent in the accident, so I dont know why hes asking if we are ok.

anyways, he goes on, saying something about his wife crying--and then he points to his house. thats when I see it. our fence. its on the ground. i'm like..uhh what? so I go outside, and there is their F150, IN my house. yeah, IN it. I'm still not quite sure how it happened, but she drove through my fence, into the house, where our bedroom is. Thankfully she is fine, no one was injured (save for the fence and house). now the fun part. it seems that he doesnt want to go through the insurance. which, would be his auto insurance. we called our home owners ins. ppl, and they said that they cant do anything. I'm kinda pissed, bc the guy is saying that he wants to fix it himself--which, hey, if he were a licensed contractor or something, I'd be all for. but I'm pretty sure hes not. I know he does do lots of stuff around his house, but that isnt good enough to me. anyways, I'm all stressed out--I mean, there isnt like a ton of damage inside; the wall is cracked right where my window sits, so the sill is like coming apart, I guess. the crack goes all the way down to the baseboard, right where our outlet is at. Its not exposed to the outside though, so I guess thats good. but what if the frame is all jacked up or something? i keep going through what if's. urgg. so, that was my week..and here are pics of all the excitement. oh, and as an aside, he moved the truck before I could get pics of it actually in my house. lame.

uh..yeah.

2009-04-30T07:54:00.003-07:00

so, real life keeps getting in the way of all the things i'd rather be doing. work. play. work and play some more. so goes it, right?

little recap of the goings on here:

-maya is officially a redneck. just kidding. she just recently lost both of her top front teeth though, so she definitely resembles one lol. she even got to partake in a little photoshoot, highlighting such tooth loss, as witnessed above ^^

-olivia is doing great in school, sassy as ever. i swear that child is 25 and not 7, ha!

-art has been working lots, so i dont see him much, and when i do, hes usually preoccupied with his new BB 8900. happy early fathers day!

-i've been suffering from severe allergies, mostly in my eyes. its horrible. i've been taking allergy pills, as well as using drops. but still, its a PITA! i miss being able to wear eyeshadow without watery stains on it hahahaha. gross.

-here are some more pics of the photoshoot i mentioned before. tina in the same mommy group as i am, and she is just amazing! i loved watching her work with maya. anyways, here is her blog, definitely check her out if youre local to SLC.

this one of olivia and I, can I just tell you, bribing a 7yo is serious business! we tried bribing her with McD's, baskin robbins. nada. she wasnt interested in the least. finally she agreed to ONE picture, and it had to be with me. lame.

but, i have to say, she does look beautiful!

i'm off to get some work done, maybe. and hopefully to get my hair did. hehe.

xoxo

monica

and then..

2009-04-06T13:18:00.003-07:00

so the MM warehouse sale. i got the carousel for $10. i was so stoked. and it looks lovely on my desk. dare i say, that i actually need more stuff to put in it? lol. i walked out of there with 4 items: the carousel, an album and 2 rubons/stickers. thats it. i know, crazy. i usually get ribbons and stuff, but i was on a strict budget that day, and it worked out. i dont feel like i missed out on anything great, except for maybe the slice, bc they had those for $99. oh well. maybe next year.

lets see..oh yeah. i scrapped. and i've been doing the LOAD at 2peas again. its nice seeing friendly and familiar faces there still. i hate that at sistv, i dont really recognize anyone anymore. so i guess 2peas will be my new/old home again. we'll see if i can keep up with the LOAD lol.

also, i got PSE 7..and i have no clue what i'm doing. i'm trying to get better at editing, but i'm not sure where to begin. I was okay with PSE 4, but its been about a year since i've used it..i've been just using Picnik, which is fine, but there are a ton of actions i'd love to put to use...so i've been spending a lot of time online trying to find tutorials to help me along the way.

well, its nice out, so the kids are having otter pops and playing outside. think i'll go join them :)

xoxo

umm..

2009-03-26T06:31:00.005-07:00

so i scrapped the other day. i've had this serious urge to ever since art and i rearranged my little scrap area. i sit here everyday and work, and whilst i'm working, i glance to the right..see the beautiful light streaming through my windows--gorgeous. and, it highlights all my thickers hanging on my clip it up! hahahahaha. i think thats the real reason i want to scrap, the thickers beckon me. and, can you believe that i actually used stamps on this damn thing? apparantly in the sunlight, i found out that i own a lot of stamps LOL. i'm sooo not a stamper, but i do like to collect them. theyre so pretty and hard to resist.

so, since i've been wanting to sb, it also makes me want new stuff---which is perfect timing bc the MM warehouse sale starts this saturday. i'm so there. i'm going in search of one of these:

the carosel. sigh..i've coveted this for years. i think the original i wanted was a pottery barn version. they do typically have these at the sales, but its still like $25, which is a lot of money for me to drop on 1 item. i'm a bargain hunter. last year, i got one of the rolling totes, it looks like this:

except mine is lime green. the inside is black with white polka dots. sooo freaking cute. anyways, i guess they retailed around $89-$199 depending on options and what all was inside. i got mine for $20!! thats the kind of deal i'm talkin about! the only unfortunate thing with the sale is that they really dont have any of their newer lines there. its mostly old foam stamps, paints, metal embellies--but they do have their ribbons for a good deal. so, i mostly go for tools and ribbons lol.

i think that might be enough ramblings for now..i'm off to find a new online home. i feel so weird posting my LO's at sis, or even at 2peas. i mean, i think i feel more at "home" at 2peas, bc i still recognize the ppl there, but i havent posted in the pub in over a year. the thing with sis, is that i like the notifications of my faves and when they post new LO's. i dont know what to do, but if i do start sb'ing more often, i defintely need to find somewhere. i feel homeless hahahaha. its like i became an online hermit. is that possible? lol.

anyways, happy greys day!

xoxo

day dreaming...

2009-03-20T08:17:00.015-07:00

i havent been able to focus much lately. i blame the gorgeous spring weather utah is having :)
so, i've been window shopping online..and you know, its not easy being a fat girl and dressing cute/trendy/fashionable. seriously..as far as B&M stores go, I can like shop at about 4: Target, Old Navy, Lane Bryant and Torrid. and come on, seriously? i'm only 30, and LB's stuff is just not my style. though i do get my undies there. torrid--I think they have *some* things i like, but again, not really my style. so that leaves Target and Old Navy. not a whole lot of selection. Why can't forever 21 sell my size? or urban outfitters? is the solution here really for me to stop being fat? LOL. maybe. but until then, I'd like to look cute...so i browsed around some places online, and i thought I'd share my spring wishlist :)

all of the clothes posted are plus size..just an fyi

**some of them i dont remember where i found, but i looked at alloy, delias,target, old navy, and etsy.

so..denim. my bestfriend. right now, i'm really loving skinny jeans. i know, i know. i swore i'd never wear them, but i actually love them--i dont think that they look too bad on me. found these ones at alloy i think--but old navy has cute ones too.

dark denim bermudas--actually, any kind of bermuda i'm really loving.

and love love the distressed roughed up look of these:

I found this tunic over at etsy..she has them in all different colors/designs. check out her shop:

rainbowswirlz

love this back!

navy blue has been my secret love for the past 3 years--im so happy to see it popping up all over the place now. this is at old navy.

and my favorite staple: long lean tanks. perfect alone or layered. especially in this pinkish/salmon color. so hot.

again, with the grey..and some navy thrown in. found this at delias

this one is from a local retailer, but they have an online store as well. they have the simplest, easy going styles. i saw this dress on display at one of their stores, and i really really want it. like now. find them here : downeast basics

now for my favorite part of the list: accessories and shoes :)

i've been looking for a necklace like this forever. i'm not big on necklaces, but i love the simple, long design of this one. check out shopbop if you like it :)

these earrings i found at downeast basics, they were $5. no lie. i love them and wear them with everything. theyre a dark wood, i know you cant really tell in the pic.

these are my sunglass, they are jessica simpson--i think they are normally about $50, but i found them at TJ Maxx for $14.99 love a bargain :)
and these are earrings i've been looking for all over the place, and i wish i could find something like this locally.

a lot of the shoes that ive posted are going to be either Jessica Simpson or Fergie. and if they arent...then i dont know where i found them LOL. these ones are JS

i would wear these with some ripped up denim bermudas, and that yellow shirt up, and the feather earrings.

also JS.

JS

Fergie
*as a side note, i didnt even know she had shoes until yesterday. lol. but i love them :)

i would marry this color if i could. and i love juicy's leather purses. they are always so comfy on the shoulder

and this little gem i found at urban outfitters. love this brown carmel color. and the pockets.

okay, i think i'd better wrap up this post..its gotten awfully long and i didnt even post all the shoes/bags i love hehehe. but, i do still have to work today..so maybe i'll post more next week :)

xoxo

happy weekend!!

ps---i read an article in the LA times yesterday that forever 21 is coming out with a plus size line launching in May! can't wait for it!

the review..

2009-03-13T06:18:00.002-07:00

so..Vegas. I can't believe that was just a week ago. I feel like I just barely left! Here's a sort of breakdown of our couple of days there...

first, is the obligatory stop at Jack in the Box--I like to refer to it as "jack in the crack". dont know why, besides the fact that its fun to rhyme. :D
And really, its not in Vegas, its in St. George, but it typically means we're close. I had to snap a photo of my cup to rub into Art.. he LOVES jack in the crack, and we've often joked about driving to St. George (its about a 4 hr drive from SLC) JUST to have jack in the box lol.

this was from the second night we were there..we were standing on one of those elevated walkways...this one was in between the Wynn and the Fashion Show mall. I'm kinda surprised that it even came out well considering the huge glass windows that I was trying to take it through :) The Wynn was gorgeous--by far had one of the nicest, cleanest bathrooms I peed in while there LOL. We also stopped in a Manolo Blahnik store..yeah. I've never been in one before, I mean, I've never even seen a pair IRL before. I'm not even sure if there is a place in SLC that even sells them lol. Anyway, we went in, just had to. Couldnt resist, especially after seeing the shoes that Carrie had left in her closet in the SATC movie. So we browsed around..and then left feeling completely underdressed/inadequate to even be in there hahahahaaa. Oh, and I tried on a couple of pairs for the first time too. Not there though..we were at the Neiman Marcus outlet, felt a little more in place there :)

I took this one for the girls. Last summer when we drove through Vegas, Maya was all excited when she saw the castle, so I thought I'd take one at night when it was all lit up. Again, through the glass window of a walkway. Not bad from my phone! We didnt go in the Excalibur though..we were just passing through. I'm always in awe of all the lights there. Kinda makes me sad when we come home to SLC, I'm like on a neon light high, and then BAM! normal city. :(

And here was one of the reasons we even went to Vegas..yes, to shop! C and I dont really gamble..our forte is makeup..and then purses and shoes. In that order :)

So Saturday we headed down to this really cool outdoor mall (not pictured) that had a Sephora. Huge deal, because we dont have one of those in SLC..so we of course went there first. I love all the makeup. I could literally spend HOURS just looking at it and trying it on. So then we headed off to MAC, which really, in hindsight, we didnt need to go to, since I can buy it at Nordstroms, but I really like being able to go into an all MAC store. So after we had all the makeup we came for, we headed down to Primm, I think, which is on the stateline of Nevada/Cali. I dont know why I prefer these particular outlets, but I do. Michael Kors, Juicy, Neiman Marcus and Guess are where we hit..and I really wish I had tons more money to spend!!

Me and C on Saturday night. We standing in front of Treasure Island..now called 'TI' I guess. I was all excited to see the show since they re-did it..We stopped last summer, but it was still under construction. Anyways..long story short, this show is not kid friendly anymore. It was a little disappointing--I mean, most people bring their kids to see the pirates and the huge ships..and yeah. Nothing but girls in their booty shorts and bras. The pirates though, not bad :)

I didnt really get many pictures of Me and C, she wasnt really happy about the camera anyway lol. Most of our shots look like that one ^^

::SIgh::: I love this sight. I love this particular spot in Vegas. The Eiffel Tower and the Bellagio fountains across the street..its just so beautiful, day or night. love love love.

So, that was it! Glad to be home..the traffic and all the walking had definitely taken its toll on me by Sunday. I was sooo grumpy when we left! I guess 2 days is plenty of time for me to see everything there!

Well, I'm off to work..happy friday.

xoxo

sharing is caring

2009-03-05T10:23:00.004-07:00

this little guy has googly eyes. so dang cute :)

thought I'd pop in and share some layouts and cards that I've done recently. I've gotten so damn lazy lately with the uploading of these. I used to be pretty good about it, I dont know what happened. Plus, I dont really have anywhere like a gallery to upload to. I mean, used to at like Sis and 2peas, but I dont frequent their boards anymore. hmmph.

So, without further ado..

I know the pics arent that great, but its better nothing right? I'm just glad I got them off my camera card :P

And since I've been scrapping again, I've been trying to fight the urge to by some new stuff. It's hard. I really need to purge, or just use what I have lol. But what fun is that? :)

Okay, I'm off to do laundry so I can have clean undies while in Vegas.

xoxo

lately

2009-03-03T10:28:00.006-07:00

I've been into movies. Like big time. I guess its because I finally am home more (working)..so I guess I have some time to do it. They help make the time pass quicker before the its time for the kids to come home. So, I'd thought I'd share whats been playing in my ipod lately:

Marie Antoinette--always a fave; love the colors, the rich textures..yum. total eye candy. and I'm a sucker for the time period as well.

The Duchess--another period type film..totally in love with Kiera Knightly. I dont think this movie got the props it should've. It really is one of my faves right now.

Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist--this one, I really wanted to see, and I'm so glad I finally did. Its the funniest and cutest little movie. And though its not my genre of music, I did like the music in the movie. This movie will be on repeat.

My Best Friend's Girl--if you know me, then you know that I love love love Dane Cook! He is seriously so hot...and Dane Cook is a funny bitch!! plays this role well. And who doesnt love them some Kate Hudson? She is so adorable.

okay, I think thats enough of the faves for today. I should really get some work done :)

so I'm off to watch Marie Antoinette, yet again. Hope you have a lovely day!!

xoxo

because I felt like it..

2009-03-02T09:17:00.004-07:00

thought i would update this damn thing. i hate that it feels like a chore. but only because i feel a lack of words. i'm not sure what to update about. i'm lame. i live a pretty non-eventful life..at least lately anyway.

so today, i've been awake a total of 3 hours, and i've cried for 2 of them. dont you love it when you just feel like you need to cry? thats what i've been feeling, so i watched P.S. I love you. that movie gets me everytime. so sweet, so sad, but perfect. plus its kinda dreary today, so i guess that kinda matches my mood too. Now I'm watching a comedy :)

last week i took the kids to the zoo, because it was their last free day of the year ( i think). It was a gorgeous day--and i took the kids right after school, so we only had a couple of hours to get around; luckily it was just enough time to see everything. i saw this peacock roaming around..it was so pretty. and lately, i've been obessesd with feathers..so i had to take a picture of it. i kinda wanted to pluck one off of it, but yeah, i didnt because that wouldnt be nice lol.

and here is one of the girls being their silly selves:

they are just growing up so fast. its killing me.. i mean, olivia reads on her own, like, big long chapter books..and maya is reading really well too. kinda makes me sad. I mean, i'm glad they are learning and all, but it just takes them one step closer to being grown. it makes me all sappy when i think about it, so lets move on :)

carolyn and i are taking off to vegas this coming weekend for a little girls only weekend. i cant freaking wait. i imagine we will be spending most of our time at sephora :) we dont have one here, the best we've got is Nordie's, which is fine and all, but a girl likes variety!

heres to hoping i will actually update more often. we'll see :p

xoxo

some randomness..

2009-02-12T01:05:00.003-07:00

something that i dont usually have a problem with, is talking. or writing. but lately, i guess words just arent coming easily to me. i can't think of anything fun or happy to write about..so i'm just gonna let some words spill from my brain. brain vomit, if you will :)

* i think i'm depressed. can i even say that? given the fact that i'm bipolar? of course i'm depressed LOL. maybe its SAD, but i doubt it. on the bright side, i did scrap a few pages the other day. it was so fun..i think i've forgotten how much i used to love it. need to start making that more of a habit again.

*today was a bit of a shitty day--drama at work, which can i just say, at 30 years old, i never thought i'd be going through; at least not like this. it has really changed my whole outlook on my job, and makes it so that i hate being there. i think i just trust people so easily, and once i find out that you've backstabbed me, or questioned my work ethic--well, i just can't forgive that. i just can't. no, i dont think i'm perfect, i know that people talk, or gossip. whatever you want to call it; but there is talking..and then there is talking..you know, like where you are maliciously saying something to upset people. sigh..enough of that. i've wasted enough of this week on that bullshit.

*anyways, so, we live in an old house. and this house, well, its falling apart. Art's gma used to live here, and apparantly much of the upkeep was neglected. within 6 months of us moving in (this was 3 years ago), the furnace broke. so, my inlaws of course blame us. because when gma lived here, the furnace was just fine. okay..whatever. then the next month, the plumbing started acting up. it was horrible. 2 weeks with no water, no showers, toilet. they had to tear up the drive way to fix whatever was wrong. AGAIN, the inlaws say, it must be something we are doing..because of course, when gma lived here, no problems! duh. i mean, here is this 70ish y.o. lady, living by herself, for like, i dont know, 30 years?? yeah, i'm sure there were no problems--but then you move in an active family of 4--voila!
so yeah, the plumbing has been acting up since like around xmas i think. i'm stressed about it..because for one, its really inconvienient to not have access to certain utilities in your own home. of course, there's my inlaws who live about 10mins away..we can use their facilities..right? no, not without them complaining about it. sheesh. they act as if we WANT things to stop working! oh yes, can we please drag our 2 children, plus ourselves to your house, with towels, toilietries, and clothes?? can we please beg my 6 year old to poop at your house, because she wont be able to later at home? i mean, come on people! but, luckily..i have one amazing, die hard hubby..he worked his butt off all day trying to fix the plumbing on his own..and he did it!! i'm so glad i can now pee at home again LOL

wow, this post was kinda lame..but its better than nothing..
i think.

xoxo
monica

sooo...

2009-01-17T16:08:00.002-07:00

I think you should head over to the It Takes All Kinds blog--I posted a new layout :)

and I thought I should post some new pics of the kids..since you know, its been a while!! These were from like last month. I just bought a Chi, and was learning how to curl hair with it..so I used them as my guinea pigs lol. But they were really good sports..and looked so cute!!!

Here is Maya:

And here is Olivia..she was soo feeling pretty!! She NEVER smiles like this when I ask to take her picture!

and finally...thought I'd share one of me too..I got my haircut a couple of weeks ago, and I soooo love it! I even had it colored..its been a while since I've had any color, so its taking me a little time to get used to it. So far, I dig it :)

This one was just for fun..I was feelin like posing like AMNT hahahaha. I'm such a dork :p

anyways, I'm off to crop with Joce..happy weekend all!!

xoxo, monica

another week passes..

2009-01-15T15:01:00.003-07:00

time has been passing me by, relatively fast. Its like..um yeah wasn't it JUST Monday? Maybe its because I haven't really had anything exciting going on..nothing to look forward to, and nothing that I'm not looking forward to either. I'm actually pretty lame lately. Work is..well its just work :) And home is quiet, which is nice. Not that I've been productive. I still spend way too much time watching retarded reality tv. I can't help it though. The trashier the show, the more I seem to love it. Yesterday it was all about Tool Academy on MTV. Seriously..this show is about these girls who have boyfriends that are total 'tools', so its like some intensive 30 day boot camp too turn them into Prince Charming. Yeah right. But, its fantastic entertainment lol.

Tomorrow I'm going to crop with one of my most favorite online friends, turned 'real life' friend. that sounds kinda lame. Why is it, if you meet someone online, its deemed 'not real' lol. Anyway, Joce is just a freakin hoot to hang out with..and we are both neurotic, so that makes for even better times. I felt really bad the last time we got together because I was soo not in a sb mood. Not that I've been in one at all, for say..I don't know, like 6 months or so hahaha. But she was a good sport about it, and tried to help me feel creative--and she even let me check out Elsies new recipe book thing. That book is so neat. I love all the eye candy in it.

And I thought I'd share a couple of the pages that I made that night..

this one is of Maya on Halloween, I know the page doesnt look like Halloween..but yeah, it was :)

And this one is of the both of us while we were at Pismo Beach in August. I just love her little face in this photo!!

anyways, thats about it for me for today :)

xoxo

soo..

2009-01-07T23:04:00.003-07:00

i'm trying. to blog again, that is. i actually have been without the internet since this summer, so almost all of my blogging before was from my phone. which, is handy, but i did miss typing on an actual keyboard!

i've been scrapbooking here and there, not like i was before (about a layout a day), but i'm trying to get the fire going again. and since i have the internet back, i actually have some incentive to scan my pages so i can share them lol. before i was just showing all the people who came to my house, which i'm sure they really appreciated that :p

i've been tweeting and downloading music most of the night. god, i've missed the internet. the instant gratification of it all! and i really cant wait to resume my online shopping!! speaking of, i just found my new fave perfume! viva la juicy ...i seriously doused myself in it while carolyn and i were at the mall last weekend. she was so sure i'd be sick of it since i put so much on, but nope! still love it. even the bottle is just so cute!

so, i think thats it for tonight..more music to dl, and some blogs to catch up on too!

xoxo

tap tap this thing on?

2008-12-30T00:42:00.001-07:00

Um..yeah. so I haven't blogged in ages! Sorry 'bout that to those of you who might actually may still be checking in here. I have to say that its just been pushed to the back of my brain for quite some time. I guess I really only updated for my mom and her friends to see what me and the girls had been up to.

And, oddly enough, that's what brings me to updating today: my mom would've been 50 today. 50. In relation to my age, I guess that sounds "old"; if she were alive right now, I'd most likely be giving her shit for being over the hill lol. But, today, I see it differently. She was young. Too young to have lost her life already--even though she had lived a very long life. I think back over how I knew her, and I swear her life was just beginning. Many people didn't know what most of her life was like, and I'm sure she preferred it that way..but I think she lived a life to be proud of--at least the last few years anyway.

She was plauged by abuse as a child, estranged herself from her siblings in her 20's, lived as an addict of meth and cocaine for over 20 years and she was a single mother most of my life. She didn't take the easy road by any means..and things between us were never perfect, but we were working on it. When I was pregnant with olivia, I told her I couldn't have her around the baby while she was high. My childhood was one thing, but I wouldn't allow it around my daughter. She just said "okay". And that was that. She quit. She just stopped. She said that the drugs weren't worth missing out on her granddaughters life. Soon after that she also quit smoking, which she had been doing since she was 13. I was amazed. And proud. I still am. I've never seen her happier than when she was with olivia and maya. They were her joy, her purpose...and legacy.

So today mom, I wish you were here. To hug you, smell your hair one last time, and sing YOU happy birthday. From olivia and maya, they say " we love you grammy hammy!"

Monica

Good intentions..

2008-11-13T18:39:00.001-07:00

I keep meaning to update, but then I somehow forget! Halloween was great at our house, the kids looked good and the weather was actually perfect! I think it was actually the first nice Halloween I've ever experienced since living in Utah. But get this, the girls got tired after about an hour! Can you believe that?? I swear,if its snowing and being all blizzard like they want to go all night, but if its a clear, cool night--forget it! Lol..

It was also the first holiday since my mom passed..it was hard for me. The kids didn't notice so much, but I missed hearing her gush over the girls' costumes. She always had a way of making every holiday, no matter how small, seem so magical and, just happy. Must be some magical mom thing I haven't inherited yet lol, because all I ever feel is stressed out! I'm really not looking forward to the next month.. :(

On to happier things, I've been scrapping lately. Not much, just some here and there. I actually even went to the LSS to see if I could buy some inspiration! just picked up the happy camper line since I didn't see much else that was new, but that was good enough to spark me a little! I'll hopefully get some pages posted soon, just need to edit them a little. Oh, you should check out the ITAK blog, we're doing a giveaway this weekend!!

Xoxo

Monica

just a thought..

2008-10-30T17:10:00.004-07:00

you should pop on over to the ITAK blog and check out the new layout I posted!!

oh, and I got bored today and decided to take some more pics of my new haircut. the only problem is, you cant really see the cut lol. but i think i look cute anyways!

so..

2008-10-29T20:58:00.003-07:00

i'm pretty lame. nothing really to update about. i'm still obsessed with my new phone. its so cool, i really can't put it down. and i dont think that i'll ever go back to a 'normal' phone again. what can i say, i'm a phone nerd now.

lets see..i got my haircut this weekend, i'm still trying to figure out if i like it or not. i mean, i do like it, but why is it that once i get home i can never emulate what they did in the salon? its so annoying. and to add to that, my flat iron broke the very.next.day. grrr. i'm so mad; i've been using my back up one, which, lets face it, it just doesnt do the job. so i'm thinking of jumping on the Chi bandwagon. its just a matter of convincing art that i really do need it. lol. so here is a pic of the cut, not styled quite as i'd prefer:

so yeah..thats about all thats happening with me. work, sleep work. and i have a cold apparently, that just popped up last night around midnight. lovely.

xoxo

current obsessions..

2008-10-13T18:55:00.003-07:00

so, the thing that is most on my mind lately..this new phone:

currently i have a sidekick slide, while it did suit my needs for a while, its really frustrating the limitations it has when it comes to the web. and i really have wanted to get an iphone, but i LOVE my carrier and didnt want to switch. so, enter this phone. its got a new OS that was developed by google--and if you know me, then you know i happen to love all things google. so i preordered this phone like a month ago, and it should be delivered somewhere around the 22nd. i so cant wait. i've turned into such a nerd reading all the techie blogs i can find about this phone. i may need some professional help lol. and incase i've piqued your curiousity, you can read more about it here

my other obsession, is really just an old one thats been rekindled. reading. ahh how i love a new book with crisp, unopened pages. i really never had time when the kids were little, but recently i've started making more time for it..and i get to start marking some titles off of my must read list. the last one i read was eat.pray.love. it was very good, just as all the reviews had said it would be. but heres what i wonder, am i the only one who doesnt like reading a book just because its gotten good reviews/or is on the NYtimes best sellers list? i hate to jump on a bandwagon, so i waited till the hype died down. and currently i'm reading this book, and i just can't put it down:

thats pretty much all i've been doing lately. well, actually i've been getting back into soap operas too--mainly just General Hospital. i know, lame. but seriously, my mom used to watch the show when i was little, so i'm familiar with the characters and stuff, but i feel so freakin old seeing how old all the actors are! and its got me hooked. can't get enough! any other GH fans out there?? please tell me i'm not alone! lol

xoxo

fall is delish

2008-10-09T01:07:00.003-07:00

i love fall. i love the smells, the sounds..everything. and it always makes me want to bake. something i inherited from my mom i think..she was an amazing cook and did wonders with all things ooey and gooey. in the last week i've already baked 2 batches of pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. i just can't get enough of them! and the more i make them the more i want to bake other things, like i really have a hankering for maccaroons. i dont know why. they arent very fall-ish. but they sound soo good. the day before yesterday i baked brownies and added butterscotch chips to them--they didnt even last through the next day!

this has been a totally random post..but i figure its better to be random than to not post at all :)

xoxo

It was lovely

2008-10-07T14:09:00.000-07:00

It rained all day saturday..it was awesome. I love the smell of rain,
the sound of the cars swooshing thru the puddles on the
street..especially while I lay covered up in my bed. It was definitely a
movie day. By sunday, the rain had cleared and left behind cooler temps,
which really made me want to take a nice long walk outside. I even got
art to join us :)
We live close by this trail that is just beautiful this time of
year..perfect spots here and there to snap a few pictures.
Xoxo
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Missing her..

2008-09-22T20:51:00.000-07:00

lots on my mind the last few days. Its been just over a month since
losing my mom, but it feels like an eternity. Sometimes I wish I didn't
think about it all the time--and at others, its shocking to me to
realize she's actually gone.

I went to the sb expo this weekend with some friends, and I actually
scrapped. Its been months since I've actually even felt remotely
creative..it was nice to feel it again. I did a couple pages of my mom,
trying to remember the last few times we were together, how I felt and
what I miss most. In fact, one of the photos is my mom & I hugging in
the hospital--I'm so grateful that Carolyn captured it, because its the
last real hug I remember her and I sharing. I keep waiting for the pain
to lessen, and strangely it just seems to be getting more intense,
especially at night when I'm trying to sleep. I miss her so much, and
luckily I dream of her often.

Well this post seems to be a bit of a downer..so I'm off to finish
watching CSI Miami :)

Xoxo

bout time

2008-09-09T22:22:00.004-07:00

So Maya started Kindergarten last week..and so far she loves it. I drop the girls off early so they can have breakfast at school (they get to eat with their cousins) and I also get saved the headache of telling them to hurry up and eat so we arent late :)

And lets see, the school has already called me 2x in the 1 week that Maya has been there. I always knew she'd give me a run for my money lol. The first time was because she'd had an accident (the school toilets flush super loud and it scares her), the second blessed event happened today. I was told that she had been playing and tripped on the asphalt, leaving her with a bloody nose and a pretty good gash on her scalp/forehead. Poor thing. Its been eventful to say the least!

There hasnt been much more exciting news here, except that I finally accomplished one of my goals for the new year--which was to sew some slipcovers for the pillows on my couch. I finally did it! We went to Ikea on Sunday and I found some super cute fabric, and thought, hmm..I could do this in one night, right? Oh, and without a sewing machine because those damn things intimidate me! Here is a realllly bad photo of the finished product::

xoxo

tgif

2008-08-29T14:25:00.005-07:00

finally friday. what a long week its been. olivia started school on tuesday. she is now a proud 2nd grader!

I've been a zombie most of the week--I work until about 3 in the morning, and then get the kids up for school at 6:30. Maya starts Kindergarten on Wednesday and she just can't wait. Although she does think that all of her friends from Pre-K will be in her new class. I havent quite broken the news to her yet lol.

I thought I'd share a few pics from the drive home from California--we stopped in Morro Bay, and then also Pismo Beach because Art lived there for a few years when he was in high school. When I started looking through all of the photos, I realized how much I seem to like toes in the sand! I had no idea I'd taken so many, but at least now I have somthing to scrapbook about, right? I think I got some good shots, and I can't wait to see how good they look after I edit them.

also, dont forget to come and check out It Takes All Kinds, I posted my intro this afternoon :)

xoxo

here she is..

2008-08-26T18:10:00.002-07:00

this is where she rests now. as soon as I saw this box, I knew it was perfect for her. Its this beautiful dark wood with these intricate flowers/vines carved in the lid. the photo really doesnt do it justice at all; and i really love that it has a place for a photo right in the center.

xoxo

Procrastination is my middle name

2008-08-25T19:58:00.002-07:00

I've been avoiding this follow up post for a while. What can I possibly say after losing my mom? Everything seems to pale in comparison right now, and to be honest, I'm almost tired of even thinking about it anymore. I miss her, more than any words could ever describe...she creeps into my every thought, the constant reminder that I will never be able to call and ask her advice, or even seek comfort. It kills me inside, these thoughts. But life goes on still, doesnt it? That hurts me too. I catch myself somedays laughing, or enjoying the girls--and I think thats wrong. Its not fair that we are creating memories that she isnt part of. I guess thats part of the grieving, feeling that everything is unfair. I took a picture of the box she is resting in, but I forgot my cord for my camera, so maybe I'll upload it tomorrow.

I do have some other news to share! I was invited to be apart of this. When I recieved the email from Fran, I was so touched that she thought of me--and then when I saw the list of the girls who will be making this blog happen--well my jaw about hit the floor! So much talent, and I'm truly flabbergasted to be amongst them. So keep checking back in, I'll be posting my intro on Friday :D

Also my best friend Carolyn and I are participating in this on Sept. 6. Her dad is living with Alzheimer's, and its so painful to watch her go through this with her family. He is truly one of the happiest people I've ever met, and I'm so honored to be able to do this with her. Please feel welcome to donate, even if its not to her.

xoxo

My hands look like hers..

2008-08-07T13:15:00.000-07:00

But I'm still glad I thought to take a photo of them anyways.
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

She's gone..

2008-08-06T20:41:00.002-07:00

She left this world, left the pain behind, and moved on to a more
beautiful place. I miss her so much, it happened too fast. Everything
around me is demanding my attention.. All I want is to sleep so I can
see her in my dreams, hug her, hold her and hear her beautiful voice.

I miss you so much, mom. I love you more than any words could ever
express. I hope to make you proud, and to raise my daughters to be
strong, loving and passionate women--just like you. Visit me in my
dreams, and know you are always on my mind and in my heart.

LGP
12/30/58--8/2/08
Xoxo

--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

So scared

2008-07-22T11:38:00.000-07:00

I feel so sick to my stomach. Like the vomit is just sitting at the back
of my throat, just waiting for me to breathe wrong. I keep re-playing
the conversation in my mind..and all I hear is my mom crying, telling me
that she is so sorry. I could barely say anything through my tears..

The cancer has spread to her bone marrow. There is nothing more the
doctors can do for her. She is 49 years old..I feel like this just isn't
fair. I just keep imagining in my mind all the things she is going to
miss..the girls finishing school, first boyfriends, first time driving a
car, me freaking out bc they are driving me crazy.. My girls falling in
love and getting married, leaving me and making their own families. Who
am I going to turn to for advice and comfort?? I want to just scream and
yell at the top of my lungs "Stop this!! Let her live, please.." But it
won't do any good. I feel like I'm 12 years old and just wanting to
throw a tantrum..to make things go my way, you know? Sillyness, that's
what that is.

So, I'm sitting here, trying to be a grown up about this. I just don't
know what to do. I need to be strong. To get through the shock of it,
and get things rolling. I called a couple hospice places this morning,
so that we can have her hospital bed setup when she gets here, as well
as other items she'll need. Its too surreal, even just typing that out.
I just always imagined us growing old together, with matching rocking
chairs on the front porch, eating mashed potatoes because we have no
teeth..

On to the good news.. There is a non profit called Angel Flights, that
donate flights to people in need of transport for medical reasons. She
is supposedly at the top of the list, so I'm hoping that she'll be here
by my birthday.. If not then, maybe no later than the weekend. We just
have to wait for a pilot to pick her, so here's hoping its soon. Once
she gets here we will have lots of work to do before we can enjoy each
other -- setting up hospice care, medicare crap and notifying Social
Security.. Sounds like fun doesn't it?

Oh, and I have to explain that picture. While I was on the phone getting
the news from my mom, I was obviously upset and crying etc.. Anyways,
I'd called Art and Carolyn to tell them (also hoping they could help
calm me down) the news--while i was doing that, the girls went in my
room, made my bed with lots of pillows and all their favorite stuffed
animals. When I got off the phone, Olivia told me I could go lay down if
it would make me feel better.. And that I might find a note if I did
decide to lay down. So I go in and look around, seeing what they had
done for me, and I started crying again at how sweet my girls are. The
note said they loved me, and that they hope I feel better.. As I was
sitting there reading the note, Olivia walked over and said "here, in
case you get thirsty from all your crying" and handed me a glass of
water. She thought of everything! What great, loving and caring girls I
have. Just like their grandma.

Xoxo
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

as promised..

2008-07-18T10:04:00.002-07:00

the cards that i said i made the other day.. i love this first one with the strawberry on it. its just so summery to me. and i love how the color scheme came out exactly how I had imagined.

this card, I dont love quite as much. maybe its bc its a design I borrowed from the CPS site and not one of my own. I dont know. I do think its cute, its just not 'me'.

I dont have much to say today, except that I'm glad its Friday, the week flew by super fast for me. I'm sitting here waiting for Art to get home from work, so I can be on my way to work. So exciting, right? dont be too jealous :D

Oh, and this pic is for my mom, so she can see my new haircut. I went pretty short, but kept a lot of length, kinda like an A-line thats choppy.

happy friday!!

xoxo

making new habits..or retrieving forgotten ones?

2008-07-16T15:29:00.002-07:00

so the last few days, I've seriously been trying to make an effort at getting the old me back. lately, I've been in this weird mode--some strange alter ego, less bright version of myself. I think that I've been spending too much time thinking, and too little time doing. Lots of things on my mind, between work, the kids, my husband, and of course, my mom. Really I know its my worrying over my mom. Which really, doesnt do much, and I realize that. So, today, instead of just pushing paper around, and looking at freshly printed photos, I actually made a few things. And, the best part was, it wasnt torture. For some reason, when I'm depressed the last thing I want to do, is the thing I love the most. Its like trying to get me into the doctor, I swear.

As the last few weeks have flown by, I sit here, looking at my scrapbook supplies, thinking that I've wasted so much money on a hobby that is trivial. I really really felt that way, and I think thats what freaked me out the most. Here I've been sitting, crying over the thought of losing my mom, the memories I have her--and the thought of the memories that we havent yet created. I've been desperately seeking out old friends, family--really anyone that knew her. That knew the mom I've known my whole life. Like, they can help me remember her. Now before I go any further, I realize she isnt dead. I'm not thinking the worst at all. Well, actually thats probably not true. I am. But I'm thinking the worst, because I want to be prepared. I want to savor every little memory I have her, everything that reminds me of her. And I want to do it now, while I'm thinking about it, while I have her to help me remember all the little unimportant things, that will one day, be the MOST important things.

I digress; I realized, in my loathing of all things sb related--what a retard I was. Seriously. Here I was, looking at all my albums, all my supplies, and questioning why I ever loved this hobby. When I finally stopped analyzing why why why.. it came to me. This whole thing with my mom and me wanting to save every little scrap of a memory--that is why I scrapbook. How did I ever forget this? Must be my depression, I swear, I'm not usually such a retard. And once I realized this (like last week), I slowly started feeling the fire again.. that passion that I felt not so long ago. This, this is what is going to help me remember. Now, the hard part is, scrapping through my depression. I'm not so good at that; I typically prefer my bed and sleeping to anything resembling real life. So, I'm starting small, and simple. Cards. Well, and the 2 layouts I did above. Heres to one small step at a time.

xoxo

happy early birthday to me..

2008-07-14T13:21:00.003-07:00

So, Saturday, Carolyn and I went to the farmers market downtown. It was really cool, as usual, but especially so since C had never been to it before. We got coffee, a ham and swiss croissant and a huge cinnamon roll to split. After walking around everything, oh, I dont know, maybe 4x each lol, I persuaded her to head to the Gateway to do some more walking around since it was so nice outside. Then I dragged her into forever 21, mostly because I dont feel right going in there alone because their clothes are waaaay too small for my butt. This way, if I'm in there with a skinny person, I dont feel so weird about it. Anyways, I was checking out purses while she was trying on sunglasses, when I happened upon this cutie:

Now, I've been in search of a cute, good sized purse ever since my car was broken into about a month and a half ago. The bastards took my ipod, my new Guess bag, along with my new Guess wallet. Grrr. Anyways, I just havent had the money to replace that bag with the one I really want--so when C saw how much I loved that pink one ^^ she decided it was perfect for an early bday present! I really do love it--its so roomy and comfy, and sits just right on my shoulder, which is mucho importante.

So, only 10 more days until I turn 30. I really dont know how I feel about it. Mostly strange I guess..I'm not exactly what I thought I would be at 30--which really, I guess is just grown up. I dont feel grown up, I dont feel like I have it all together like I thought I would. But really, thats okay. I'm not freaked out about it either. I mean, yeah, 30 is definitely not 25, but I'm so much better now than I was 10 years ago. I'm more me now, than I can ever remember, so thats what counts, right?
xoxo

we did a little of this..

2008-07-13T13:52:00.001-07:00

I played hookie from work on Friday, and decided to do a little of this instead:

Such a nice day to spend at the park..Maya even enjoyed it despite not being to get really, really wet. They climbed up the rocks and onto the the little 'canyons'. Shh..dont tell anyone, because they really arent supposed to do that, but no one seems to follow those directions. I think the water is too inviting to not climb into it.

Its been a quiet weekend around here, yesterday was Art's 37th bday. I really can't believe that it came and went so fast. We really didnt do much to celebrate, most of his family is in Mexico on vacation; so we had some takeout from the Other Place. Those that are local to SLC might/might not know about this little gem downtown--its by far the best Greek place I've ever been to; their chicken pasta salad is my favorite!

Not much to update about.. or maybe I'm just not feeling chatty.. though I am hoping to get some sbing done since its been on my mind the last few days.
xoxo

Summertime..

2008-06-30T20:35:00.000-07:00

So summer is officially underway around here; we celebrated olivia's 7th
birthday this weekend, and the theme was Hannah Montana. Up until the
party, or rather, the planning of the party, I had no idea that Olivia
liked Hannah so much. But now, its like someone puked Hannah all over my
house :hahaha:
I do have to say that she had great parties, and went home a very happy
girl.
Luckily she also got a pool, so I know we'll be spending lots of time in
the backyard..and hopefully not getting pooped on by all the birds!

Nothing more really going on here.. Just trying to decide what to do for
the 4th (please no one tell my children that Hannah will be here doing a
concert!). I think I'm still in the adjustment period of trying to get a
good sleep pattern. I still can't drag my ass out of bed before 10.
Ugh!! You'd think I'd have more will power, or at least louder kids!

Xoxo
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

its only been about 2 weeks..

2008-06-22T17:32:00.001-07:00

I really do. I don't really think that there is any other phrase out there that could sum up how I feel, better than that. I miss my mom. She is back at home and out of the hospital, and seems to be doing pretty good. She is tired and hot, but she is happy. I wish I were there. And I wish I could've stayed until she got out of the hospital. I sit here, wondering if I will regret not staying. I wonder if its a possibility for me to move my family down there, just so I can be there with her. Really, that isn't feasible for us, it would be easier to move her here, but again, not feasible right now. I want to enjoy and live every moment as possible, with her. I want my kids to be able to know her better than they do. I feel like my life is nothing without her in it. I wonder everyday if I will regret the choices I make today. She tells me constantly that she isn't dying, that she is going to live forever. I know that isn't true. I know that she is just being her usual optimistic self. But, I can't help feeling that at any given moment, something could happen and I wouldn't be there. Don't get me wrong--I don't think that she is dying right now, but I'm a realist, and I know that she is sick, and thats what scares the shit out of me. I dont want to wait for her to be dying to be able to see her and spend time with her. I want to enjoy the normal, everyday moments. I want to be able to take care of her and be with her. And just love her. Hug her whenever I feel like it. I'm so afraid of losing her, and I know that I need to just stop being afraid, and enjoy her right now. Enjoy her crazy silliness, her talk about her damn cat, and buying groceries. I need to just relish in the mundane, and be thankful for phones.

still adjusting..

2008-06-19T10:43:00.003-07:00

so the whole family went to the annual church carnival--as per usual, the first ride was the ferris wheel (that is what its called, right? i always seem to forget what its called.) there was face paintings, which i didnt get a picture of, games, a cake walk (which the girls refused to take part in, so i had art buy me a brownie to make up for it :) as for art and i, we enjoyed some beer and smothered burritos. it was really pretty good.

today i'm suffering from a sleep hangover. i always know that if i sleep too long, my head will hurt. but its so flipping hard to get my butt out of bed! ugh. so, i'm still adjusting. since coming back from seeing my mom, i quit my morning job. its so nice only having one job and being able to spend all day with the girls--but the hard part is adjusting to working later (abt 6pm to 2am). thus, the reason i sleep so late. or at least i like that as an excuse lol. yesterday i actually got off a little early and decided to actually try to scrapbook. and it worked! i mean, it took me a while to get it looking how i wanted, but i eventually finished it. and here it is:

so i'm hoping that now that i've gotten over the inital 'where do i begin?', that i can continue on scrapping more frequently. we'll see. i always was better at procrastinating.

happy thursday :)

xoxo

Chalk art festival

2008-06-15T09:49:00.000-07:00

Took the girls to the gatway yesterday to check out the locals doing
chalk art--they both adults and children entrants, and they both amazing
to see. I know these pics just don't do them any justice, but I wanted
to share.

My mom should be getting out of the hospital some time today; she has
been practicing going up and down stairs, and says she is feeling really
confident about it. Its been so great hearing her sounding so happy and
confident--its really just so amazing the turn around her health has
had. Thank you to everyone who has kept my mom and our family in your
thoughts and prayers, they truly do help.

Happy fathers day!
Xoxo
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Finally back home

2008-06-12T17:37:00.000-07:00

Had to take a last minute trip to california to see my mom last
saturday. The cancer has spread to her liver and her spinal cord. I'd
been worried about something like this happening--she'd been complaining
about a numbness in her legs, and it turns out that was caused by a
tumor in her spinal cord. I got down to the hospital saturday evening,
and she was just in great spirits and so happy to see me and the girls.
She has been walking the last few days and will hopefully be back home
soon..she is making great progress. As for me, my head is still in a fog
just trying to absorb everything. I took today off work, but I'm not
feeling much better about things yet, all I know is I'm not ready for
reality just yet. Anyone know of a dark hole I can hide in for a little
while??
Xoxo
--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

wheeler farm..the experience of a lifetime..

2008-06-04T20:58:00.000-07:00

last week i was able to go with olivia and her first grade class, on a field trip to this local farm--Wheeler Farm. first, let me say, that i've lived in the salt lake valley for most of my life--well, at least half of it. and while i had heard of Wheeler Farm, I'd never been. But really, lets face it; if you know me, then you know that i dont like bugs, dirt or stinky animals. period. so i've never had any interest in going to this place. But now that i'm older (gasp!), i think that i'm now actually able to appreciate nature, and find beauty in all things--whether or not they are stinky. Anyways, I was pretty excited to go, since usually its Art that goes on the field trips.. I couldnt wait, and neither could olivia.

So, lets fast forward to me getting to the school: its a little chilly, kinda overcast, but not too bad. I grab my sweater, just in case. I mean, we'd been experiencing pretty nice weather in the mid 70's. I thought I was thinking ahead. Anyways, I get inside, and Olivia sees me. The first thing out of her mouth is "mom, we have to wear tennis shoes, you know, we're going to a farm." Um, yeah I know where we are going. But like I said, its been warm, so I was wearing my flip flops--duh. We get to the farm, after an excruiatingly long and LOUD ride on the bus. Seriously?? who the hell crams 60 1st graders on one damn bus? I was ready to push out the emergency window and throw myself into the traffic on I-80 at that point.

Anywho.. we get there. Its a little windy--not too bad. The teacher casually mentions something about rain, but I'm not really listening or caring. The clouds arent THAT dark. We walk around for about 10-15 minutes, when all of a sudden--and I do mean sudden, there is a torrential downpour. I'm talking ginormous rain drops. Everywhere. We run for cover to the nearest place with a roof--the chicken coop. Yup. Me and 20 first graders with 3 class moms whom, by the way, dont speak English. Luckily the teacher had brought some garbage bags that we used to turn into make shift rain coats for the kids. Then we just stand there. Us, and chickens. This lasted for about 15mins before we made a run to the big barn--where the other classes had been. So yeah, we stayed there for the better part of the field trip..we didnt get to see many animals at all--but it was still fun. Even though my feet were covered in dried up dirt/mud, my hair was frizzed beyond belief. Olivia was right about the tennis shoes. Who knew?

some of the best news ever..

2008-05-14T09:17:00.003-07:00

so i havent posted much about my mom lately--mostly because I've just been super worried about her. yes, she was in remission. actually, she still is. but they wanted her to go through radiation. on her brain. and i about freaked. radiation is serious. not that chemo isnt. because it is. but radiation? yeah. i didnt take it well. so shes been going everyday for about 2 weeks now..and while i can tell that it is taking its toll on her, she has been a trooper, always being upbeat and positive. but still, i could tell that she was scared, and that really scared me. anyways, she got the best news yesterday..this friday will be her last day of radiation, instead of having to continue for the next 2 weeks! i'm so happy that she is responding to the treatment so well. it was such a relief!

so that is my good news for the week--hell maybe even the year.
xoxo

it was a pretty day..

2008-05-07T14:10:00.002-07:00

and also the perfect day to meet up with chastity and her friend mark. me and chas started talking a few months back at sistv, and a friendship formed. only problem was she lived in tennessee! but, lucky for me she has lots of friends here, so she came to visit this last week. it was so fun to finally meet her and to do some scrap shopping. and we really couldnt have planned it better, since it was national scrapbook day on saturday, so we got lots of stuff on sale! i even tried something new--chipotle! it was pretty good, but i can't say that i'd replace it with cafe rio, they will always be my fave.
and sadly, even though i did pick up a few things while shopping, i STILL havent scrapped in months. i need more time!! seriously. just last week i got a promotion at one of my jobs, so hopefully once the girls are out of school, i'll be able to quit the other job--which means lots more time! i can't wait! i sooo need a vacay. and i miss scrapping.
xoxo

its been about a month..

2008-04-25T08:52:00.002-07:00

so i figured i'd better update! ha.

i was just blog hopping as i usually do, when i came across this clip from cz's blog that got me thinking..

Six-Word Memoir book preview from SMITHmag on Vimeo.

i wish i could write like that. like, when i read postsecret on sundays, i think to myself, gosh, these people can write. and its not like a novel--just the simplest, most powerful words. i wish i could do that.

reading these inspire me. to be better, to live longer, healthier, happier. sounds corny i know, but i've really been trying to take stock of my life and figure out just what i'm wanting out of it--and of course how to get there. i want to know how to live my life and feel like i've not wasted one second of it. to fully enjoy every bit that is handed to me, and to live with no regrets.. maybe i'm just feeling all introspective because i havent had much time to myself lately. i swear all i do is work and sleep.
maya begs me everyday to not go into work. it kills me to leave the girls. but i have to. at least thats what i think--but then i get to work and i wonder, is this really more important than spending time with my family? i hate being a grown up and having to decide between supporting my family and being there for my family.

anyways, maya has been sick the last few days so i took the morning off work to spoil her a bit. she's now wrapped up like a mummy in her bed watching spongebob and eating toast. she didnt have a fever this morning and i'm sure i couldve taken her in to work with me anyways, but to be honest, i was looking forward to a little snuggle time with her myself.
xoxo

busy busy busy

2008-03-26T14:01:00.002-07:00

wish i had something more exciting to share! but i've been so busy with work..and work that there hasn't been much time for anything else. this pic was taken about 2 weeks ago when we took the girls to see the disney princesses on ice. it was so fun! i actually enjoyed it as much as the girls did--and the cotton candy didnt hurt :)

hope all is well with everyone in blogland!

xoxo

2008-03-14T08:54:00.000-07:00

so i remember, not so long ago, when i truly wished that i was busy. that i actually would have a reason to get up and get dressed. someplace to be. and now, i can honestly say, that i wish that i didnt have anywhere to be, or any reason to get up out of bed. about a month or so ago i took on a second job--so i'm rarely home besides the weekends. i'm so TIRED. but mostly, i miss having time to do things that i want to do. i'm never satisfied i tell ya!

so..i've had plenty to update about, just havent had the time. and i know that i was tagged by joce a little while back, so hopefully i can get to that this weekend. i really miss having the time to even comment on blogs! but i'm going to really try to get back in my groove :)

happy friday!

i've got a plan

2008-02-10T19:35:00.000-07:00

so i actually scrapped. the first time in a couple of weeks! this was a 'get real' challenge, where we had to just scrap something real. and well, this topic has been on my mind for a while . it was super inspired by post secret.it was fun to join in on the challenges over at sis--i've really missed the connection with my friends. and i love having a reason or topic or something. i can always rise to the occassion when there is a time limit imposed lol.

xoxo

saved by the bell

2008-01-28T16:17:00.000-07:00

so, i didnt have to do jury duty! phew! i was so worried when i heard my number on that little recording. but luckily, right after my number was mentioned, the nice lady recording said i didnt have to come in! saaaaweeeet. totally made me feel so much better.

friday i went out and played poker for the very first time. and can i just tell you..when i told these boys that i'd never played before irl--they SO did not look too happy lol. but i think i did pretty well and held my own! i was proud of me. i wasnt the first one knocked out, so that was rad. GO ME!

saturday was what i was looking forward to most. the crop with the mommy group at this local burger joint. its so fun going and just laughing and eating a burger and just creating. but i have to admit, there was this one lady, that totally got my panties all up in a bunch. i dont know what i ever did to her, but she really seems to go out of her way to make me feel unwelcome. i hate feeling like an outsider. and i'm always sure to be on my best behavior so as not to come off wrong to people who don't know me. but this lady, she just wants me to feel like the outsider i think. i hate feeling like that. but..i didnt let her keep me from scrappin! here is one of the pages i did that night:

so now i'm sitting here all warm and snug in my house while its almost like a blizzard outside. it was so warm this weekend (like in the 40's)..and then it started to get windy so you totally knew a storm was coming. anyways..thats whats going on in my neck of the woods!!
xoxo

my civic duty

2008-01-23T11:38:00.000-07:00

i always wondered how people got chosen for jury duty--is it off voter registrations, i'd wonder? or maybe its off driver's licenses. who knows. but whatever it is, they got my number. i've been calling every night after 5pm (as instructed by the postcard), and so far so good. but i think my number is up. they are really darn close to calling me in, and i'm nervous as heck. i've only been to the courthouse once before. i HATE undergound parking. i always seem to forget where i parked..yeah. i'm that girl that loses her car in the parking garage. anyways, i'm crossing my fingers that i dont have to go, not just because i dont know what to expect. (even though thats a big reason) but also because that means that art would have to take the day off to take care of the girls. such a PITA. seriously.

in other news, i've been sick the last 2 weeks or so. at first it was like a cold and now its not so much..but i get these waves of dizzyness that just plain suck.i'm so over this cough too. blech.

so because i've not been feeling well, i've not been feeling like scrapping. but guess what i signed up for? something that i've just been wishing and wishing someone would do so that i could learn how to use PSE. i mean, i've only had it for 2 years lol! Adrienne Looman is offering this artistic edge class..i was so excited! i ran right over to etsy..and guess what? it sold out. yeah. just my luck. but luckily she saw how popular this is, and offered more classes! yippeee! I so can't wait. Sure i can maneuver around PSE, and i can do digi stuff. but i really have no clue how to use it to edit/enhance my photos. so now, my job is take lots of photos before the class so i have some stuff to work with. so psyched!

so thats it from me.

xoxo

oh and p.s.

please cross your fingers that if i do have to go in tomorrow for jury duty that i dont lose my car. thanks :)

she KICKED cancer's ass

2008-01-21T08:54:00.000-07:00

my mom. she is amazing. i know i dont tell her that enough. but its true. she is.

just 9 months ago she found out she had cancer. at first glance because of where it was located, they told her it was ovarian. but after surgery and biopsies..we found out it was 4th stage lung cancer. i was so terrified. but she was brave. she said she was going to kick its ass. she's been having non stop chemo since may (when i was there to visit her)..and now she is done.

last week she had a PET scan (and some other tests i think) to see how the mass in her lung was looking. her doctor called her and told her everything looked NORMAL. she told me that-- and its unbelievable. i mean, i've been trying to get myself to believe that she even HAD cancer. now to hear that she has actually survived..has beaten it. crazy. good crazy.

she goes in this week to get re-staged and to talk about whats next. she is so excited. and i'm nothing short of proud. to say that i've been pessimistic during all of this is an understatement. i'm a realist. i know that people can't just be cured. but i believed in her. i knew that she wouldn't give in. or give up.

so, that was the big news over my weekend. nothing could top that.
happy monday :D
xoxo

the best LAUGH ever.

2008-01-09T21:22:00.002-07:00

if you need a laugh..you must watch this. me and art just sat here laughing uncontrollably <---see i can't even spell i was laughing so hard there were tears.

xoxo

got bored..

2008-01-08T16:31:00.000-07:00

so the other day i was a little bored, and realized it had been awhile since i'd taken any self portraits. so kelly prompted me to take some; especially since i got my haircut about a month ago. yep. i'm sportin bangs. i think in the course of my 29 years on this planet, i've tried them quite a few times. but you see, me and bangs just dont get along. i dont know if its because they have attitude and just wont sit the way they are supposed to, or if its that i can't quite get used to them being semi in my eyes..and all over my forehead. so anyways, the bangs in these pics are brushed to the side, which is about as 'bangy' as i get. i like it because i look a little different, but not too different, kwim? change is fun sometimes. and now i really see the resemblance between olivia and i. funny it took bangs to see it!

and today, i recieved my very first studio calico kit. man. its pretty. and i really am in love with those collage press papers. seriously. i've played around a bit with some other lines, but i really love this grayson hall stuff. so..i have some pics printed, a new kit, and hopefully i'll actually make something out of the two!

xoxo

looking back..

2008-01-06T22:08:00.001-07:00

i feel like over the last year, so much has changed. my girls have grown from toddlers into young ladies. i've stopped taking this hobby so seriously, and have tried to let myself start enjoying the creative process again. in doing that, i have found myself stepping back from mb's, not submitting for calls or DT's. and i feel okay with that. sure some days i feel disconnected with the friends i'd made online--but overall i feel good. heres to another year of growth!!
xoxo

i actually got it up in time!

2007-12-26T14:31:00.000-07:00

i know, hard to believe for those that know me, because i procrastinate so much. but yes, the tree was up in time for christmas. i actually got it up with 2 days to spare lol. i have to admit that putting up the tree is one of my least favorite things to do (ranks right up there with taking it down)..but once we do get it up and decorated, its just beautiful. and i could sit there for hours and just look at it. which i usually do, becauase i'm a dork like that. :P

christmas was a blur, as always it came too fast, spent too much, ate too much and didnt sleep nearly enough. i swear, i went to work this morning as a zombie! and i even had the luxury (not!) of taking the girls with me, who were surprisingly well behaved. i am really blessed to have an employer that understands the life of a working mom! every friday maya gets to go with me into the office for a few hours while i get stuff done. but since both girls are out of school for xmas break they had to come in with me today, which is fine as long as they stay quiet or i can't concentrate. plus i dont like them to bother other people, otherwise they may not be as welcome next time, kwim?

so now i'm home for the afternoon and i can't decide if i should nap or eat some of the goodies leftover from xmas. i'm thinking nap..but the girls keep asking me to open up more of their presents so they can play with them. i have boxes everywhere..and those damn little grey twisty things. you know the dumb things they put on the EVERY toy ever made to keep it from shifting in the box. i hate those. they suck. but today i was feeling generous (ha!), so i opened 2 toys for the girls. here are some pics of the girls opening some gifts xmas morning::

maya got a new gameboy for xmas as they had been
sharing my old one...so they both also got gameboy games

the 'big' gift was this little 'city' for their LPS toys

olivia writing in her new journal that grammy lisa
sent. the girls and i cried as i read the letters that
she wrote to each of them. we missed her a lot this year.

and here is art with his new electric razor thingy.
gotta love that million dollar smile!

and i guess that about sums up the last couple of days! now i'm hoping for some relaxing time..and then maybe i'll feel like cleaning up my desk and getting to work on some projects
for crop addict!

hello december..

2007-12-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

seriously, can we just rewind back to october? this year has just gone by terribly fast. especially the last 13 days. today i'm no longer the mama to a little girl and young lady. today, i'm the mama to 2 young ladies. yes. maya is 5 today! i can't believe it. something about her just always made me think that she would always be my baby. and i know she will be..but i dont know if i'm ready for her to grow up just yet. i could definitely settle for a slow down. so today she is having a cupcake party in her her pre-k class, while i tend to olivia having head lice. grr. but now thats all taken care of :)

after i pickup maya, we are coming home so that olivia can make her a special birthday card, then its off to toys R us. maya has been anxiously awaiting this day so that she can pick out a toy. then i think we might have a fun birthday lunch. we dont typically celebrate big on the actual birthday, since it usually lands during the week. so sunday will be the party day. lots of stuff to do today, fun stuff thankfully.

last night i made a few christmas cards..and i might actually get them sent out before xmas! here are a few::

7 years ago, yesterday

2007-11-19T08:36:00.000-07:00

i said i do. and i meant it.

my boyfriend became my husband, my lover, my confidant, my best friend, the man i would have children with.

i wont say we havent had ups and downs. lots of downs actually. but i hope that most of the turbulent times are behind us. we deserve some good happy times. 7 years is a long time...and i hope we have 5x more ahead of us. he is a great daddy. and a fantastic husband (most of the time lol).

i have been blessed.

holiday trees

2007-11-16T08:38:00.000-07:00

can you believe the boutique is here?! geez, this week just flew by!

here are two of the four 'holiday trees' i have made for the boutique..the blue one measures about 12inches high and the red one measures about 18inches. the other two that i have are also of the red/green color combo..and they are also 12inches. they were super fun to make, but seriously time consuming at first! but now i think i've got the hang of it! whats funny is i've been calling them topiaries, and no one knows what i'm talking about, and appearantly these arent really topiaries anyways :P so i have christened them 'holiday trees'. to get the supplies for the trees you can just head on over to out on a limb :D

anyways, there will also be lots of cards and picture frames as well, but i havent had time to take any pictures, so you definitely need to come check them out tonight!!

xoxo

been gettin crafty..

2007-11-10T22:24:00.000-07:00

for this! its been in the planning stages with some other local moms for the last month or so..and me, being the procrastinator i am, just barely got most of my stuff done today :D but so far so good. even had carolyn come over to help with a few things. so, if you're local, i'm hoping you'll be there!! there will be tons of stuff, plus you can grab a burger at hires! whats better than that? i will have almost all the cards that are on my etsy, plus quite a few christmas cards, and home decor items like picture frames, a mirror or two, and some topiaries.

in other news, we are in the process of buying a house, so thats super fun. NOT! it is super stressful though. but i'm really excited to have our own home again. and we just got a new car last month, and i love it. its so nice to not have to rely on carolyn to drag my butt everywhere lol. plus i think the last time i enjoyed this much was when i first got my license lol. the girls love the new car too..they are constantly asking if we can go somewhere fun..so last weekend we took a trip up Big Cottonwood. Too bad we missed the fall colors :( but it was fun to just spend an afternoon outdoors. the girls even got to play in some snow. i havent had a chance to edit them yet..but here are a few pics::

so hope eveyone is having a wonderful veterans day weekend..and i'm hoping to post some pics of the projects i've been working on for the boutique in the next couple of days :)
ciao!

i'm a cherry girl!!!

2007-11-01T15:16:00.000-07:00

i met kate and lindsay about a month or so ago at the local scrapbook expo. i can't even explain how excited i was to find a lss that actually carried hambly, bam pop and love elsie. seriously. and then to see that they actually had *new* product at the expo was just icing on the cake. for reals. i so can't wait to get started!!

come check them out!

out on a limb scrapbooking

today

2007-10-31T16:09:00.000-07:00

the girls got to dress up in their costumes for school. :) olivia is a witch, and maya is a bride. then after maya was done with school she came with me to work for a halloween potluck..and can i just say..sometimes other people's food just doesnt live up to your own expectations. :P

but the desserts were good :)

after olivia finished school we headed to the park and looked at ginormous leaves..climbed the monkey bars and rode a horse. not a real horse though..just a little bouncy one. it was nice. and cool. and just..nice.

mama said..

2007-10-10T20:56:00.001-07:00

okay..so that would've totally been a cool photo..if the mirror was clean :P
been missing her alot lately..maybe its the hormones..maybe its just the time of year (being that its close to the holidays). or maybe its just that i'm so freakin busy lately that my emotions are finally catching up with me. anyways.. when we were talking the other day on the phone, my mom said she'd noticed the last few times we'd talked, that i sounded happy. and i said 'me?, happy?, really?' lol. made me feel a little....well, happy, to hear that. i felt happy. and it felt good.

once upon a time

2007-10-04T11:43:00.001-07:00

it was licky's birthday

so we decided a surprise party was in order...

complete with cake and presents...

yes..i actually bought a cake and presents for the stuffed cat. and might i add, that it wasnt just maya's licky but also olivia's licky. isnt that kind of a strange name for a stuffed cat? and its weird that both the girls named their kittens that. but i'm a sucker. and it was so fun to have a little party for really no reason at all. the girls were so stinkin surprised and so happy..and it cost me less than 10 bucks!

i've been sick the last week or so..i have this cold that just won't let go. blah. so i've just been working and laying low, not really doing much of anything else. i do have a few lo's to share from LSS2 and top designer but i think i'll upload them in a day or so.

happy thursday!

need a laugh?

2007-09-17T14:43:00.000-07:00

ok so i totally stole this from gigi's blog bc it made me giggle. it was way funny with her answers, and not so much with mine. hmm....

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
bubba lexus

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
new york superfudge chunk chips ahoy (hee hee)

3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
m gon

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
black cat

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
suzanne orange (thats SO not soap opera-ish)

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
gon mo

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink put "The")
green the dr pepper

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
gordon martin

9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne, favorite candy)
pink sugar snickers (thats actually a good one! ha!)

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's & father's middle names )
gail lopez

sometimes i cry for no reason

2007-09-13T19:54:00.000-07:00

and if i were alone right now, thats what i'd be doing. i just got off the phone with my mom--and thats not the reason i want to cry, which is a good thing :) (and more on that later) but sometimes i just get this overwhelmingly sad feeling, and its hard to shake. i can never quite put my finger on what it is that can make me go from 'normal' to bawl baby. well, besides the BPD. :P

anyways.. maybe its just stress. lots of grown up crap going on and maybe its just my way of dealing. anyways it does seem to help a bit to write about it. i used to keep a journal..and when i say that i used to, i mean that i still do, just havent written in it since like june. for as long as i can remember i've always had something to write in--a spare notebook, a blank piece of paper. it really didnt matter as long as there was space to write. most of them i've kept, but last summer i threw one of them away. it held too many bad memories, so much sadness. i dont regret throwing it away at all..bc it was a bit of a release, just letting go of the past you know? but the thing i do regret, are the memories that were good that went along with the bad. but i guess if i still remember them, thats all that matters.

so anyways..speaking of the past, i've had a couple of my friends pop back into my life lately. its kinda weird, but in a good way i think. the one friend i've known since high school and she is exactly the same--a total blast, and always happy. i need more happy in my life, and she is perfect for that. its also fun remembering HS with someone..shes like a living breathing yearbook lol.

and for news about my mom..she is doing GREAT! she just had a scan of her brain the day before yesterday and its perfectly clear and looking good! i'm so proud of her..she has been having non stop chemo treatments, nupajin (i know spelled that wrong!) shots and countless poking by needles. but she has stayed strong and positive..and has hardly had any bad days at all--she is amazing and so strong. i know that if it were me in her shoes, i would be crumbling by now. but she is just taking it one day at a time and just plain being so damn happy about life. i admire that in her--i wonder if its heriditary bc i dont think i got that trait ;)

i think thats it for today.

ciao!

phew!

2007-09-07T09:13:00.000-07:00

i was on a scrapping frenzy the other day. i think i did like 5 lo's in one day! which, for me is a lot, but then i add in the fact that i havent really been scrapping that much to begin with, and then add in that i was doing them all the day before they were due. craziness i tell ya. but i did get all my darejacks done, so i was happy :) that one up there is the amberjack and i really love it. i've never scrapped about that before and it felt pretty good--plus i put those pics to good use i think!

so yesterday we took the girls to the fair, it was opening day so it was only 2 bucks a person, and kids under 5 are free ::yay::
but i have to admit that i was feeling kinda bummed bc art couldnt get off work early and we didnt get there until like 7:30; so i figured we wouldnt be able to look at much stuff or have the kids go on many rides. turns out, we were able to do all that we wanted and we were home before 10! lol. i think thats a record, and i even got a carmel apple and some cotton candy, 2 must haves from the fair. the only bad thing that happened, is that, in typical monica fasion, i forgot my freakin camera. yeah. not so cool. but whatev. i took some pics on my cell, and they sucked lol.

today its lookin pretty nice outside--its been crazy windy, rainy the last few days, totally bringing on the fall weather, which i love. feels like heaven outside. and lucky for me, its arts 5 days off this weekend, so maybe we'll even head out to the greek festival..cross your fingers i can convince him ;)

so happy friday and weekend...and dont forget to check out the dares, (no link for them bc their site is down.) bc LSS starts today! and check out bad girls kits bc they have the top designer competition going too! busy weekend!

xoxo

yeah..we game.

2007-08-31T09:04:00.000-07:00

this is how maya spends her morning while i work. she looks quite comfy, doesnt she? sometimes i feel guilty that she spends part of the morning playing with the gameboy so that i can work..but i figure an hour of games wont do her much harm. besides, we all game, right? i know my family does. art has his ps2--which i know he'd love a ps3--but at 599, that aint gonna happen for a while! and for my birthday last month, art bought me a pink DS. i love it. its fun to cozy up in bed, him playing god of war, and me playing cake mania lol.

today is orientation for maya's preschool..and then scenes like the one above won't be happening. she'll be spending 2.5 hours learning, singing and playing! she can't wait...and neither can i :)

the day drags..

2007-08-30T09:11:00.000-07:00

i'm not sure yet if its bc olivia is in school until 2..or if its my lack of really doing anything. i mean, i get up. feed maya. talk with maya. work a little. then i surf the web. and then the day is gone. just.like.that. but whats weird about that, is that come 4pm..i'm like man, this day is going by slow. i dont know how it can be both, but in my world, appearantly its possible.

so yesterday i scrapped. it wasnt painful or anything either! and i actually like how it turned out. bonus :)
today i dont know if that is going to happen again..bc well, i'll just be totally honest. art is off today, so i slept in. let him take olivia to school and tend to maya. so yeah. here i am with a sleep hangover, and i dont want to work, i just want to bang on my keyboard all day :P
ok that was lame. but for reals, i just dont feel like working. i want to shower and just hang with maya. i can always work later, right?

and this time i didnt cry..

2007-08-29T10:30:00.000-07:00

and neither did maya! olivia looked so cute on her first day of school--1st grade!! i can't believe how fast this summer went by, it sort of feels like it hadnt even really begun. ::sigh::
anyways, she had a great first day and made some new friends. i couldnt ask for more :)

maya will be starting next week and she can't wait. its been absolute torture just dropping off/picking up olivia. she just doesnt understand why she can't stay there too. but in time, i tell her..just a little while longer. i think its so great that both of them love school so much, and i really hope it stays that way for a long time!

not much else going on right now..planning a little vegas trip with carolyn for next month, so i seriously can't wait for that! been working lots and not doing too much scrapping. still trying to find that balance. again.
happy hump day =)

ever have one of those days?

2007-08-20T08:26:00.001-07:00

so last night i had one of the most horrible dreams, i think i've ever had. i dreamt that maya died. i dont know how or why..but she did. soon afterward, in the dream, i had another baby girl. and she looked just like maya. but it wasnt her. i was devastated. i was crying so hard, i actually woke myself up. it was horrible. i kind of have a feeling i know why i dreamt this--last night, before bed, i punished maya for playing with their dvd's and losing one of the cases. and inside--i felt bad for it. i mean, it seemed so trivial--yet its important for her to know that dvd's are not toys. anyways, i must've felt much worse than i thought i did. so today, i feel outta whack...blah. but i'm so happy that my dream is over and i can kiss and hug maya and olivia today--doesnt that sound silly? anyways, thank goodness that children are naturally forgiving =)

yesterday was kind of a blah day too. i'm slowly trying to get myself back to normal, so i tried to scrap. can i just say ICK! i mean, i was enjoying myself, but i really hate what i created and that was not cool. i need to get out of this funk, i'm so tired of it! i've tried stepping away, i've tried looking at magazines..lots of magazines--domino, allure, in style, lucky, simple scrapbooks..you name it. and nothing. i mean, i see lots of pretty things..but nothing that makes me want to scrapbook. ::sigh:: i miss enjoying scrapbooking. anyways, enough of that--today i'm going to scrap and not putting any pressure on myself for it to be perfect. i think thats the problem. so today..its about fun :)

xoxo

missing her..

2007-08-18T10:03:00.001-07:00

today she is doing the relay for life in paso robles..
i wish i was there with her, to laugh with her, encourage her, and see her finish it. she's been talking about this relay all summer..she was so happy to be apart of it, and to be able to join in the survivors breakfast. she said it was very emotional, and i can only imagine.
so mommy..here's to you, always being strong, always being happy..and SURVIVING.
i love you.

seriously??

2007-08-13T21:46:00.000-07:00

wow. i almost totally disappeared there. totally sucked into real life for a bit. been working..working and did i mention working?? bc thats what i've been doing. here's a recap of the last month

turned 29
got a new tile floor in the kitchen
olivia lost 2 new teeth
both girls registered for school
got a new fridge
got new flat screen monitor

and not much else :P i guess we did lots of shopping..but nothing really fun besides the new monitor lol. i havent even really scrapped except for this lame ass crop me and a friend went to--can i just say that owners dropping the f-bomb just kills the mojo? yeah. not so fun. i did get some lo's done but i've been so damn lazy that i havent even scanned them. maybe that can be my goal this week hehehe.

i was tagged by my chica jocelynne so that is::

5 Things in my refrigerator:

1. milk

2. a-1

3. herdez green salsa

4. cream cheese

5.capri suns

5 Things in my car:

1. sunglasses

2.crucifix

3.napkins

4.denim jacket

5.empty cups

5 Things in my purse or backpack:

1.my wallet

2.my nano

3.2 mac lipglosses, 1 in pinkarat, 1 in viva glam

4.mac compact

5.pen

5 Things in my closet:

1.last years xmas presents

2.wrapping paper and gift bags

3.bedding

4.carseats

5.tablecloths

5 Things in the world I want to see before I die:

1.the met in nyc

2.nyc

3.new england in fall

4.my children grown and happy

5.me grown and happy =)

ok so i think thats about it for now..i'm so boring!

has it really only been a week?

2007-07-19T16:10:00.000-07:00

i've been so super busy the last week, i can't believe its almost over! first let me start by saying that i've been absent due to me getting a new job! yay! and after one more week of training i'll be working from home--double YAY! training is going really well, and its been nice to get out of the house and spend some time around adults =) and the girls have gotten their very first taste of daycare, and they are doing good too. i think i had the hardest time on monday when i got back in my car after dropping them off--its like i suddenly realized that this was the first time that they'd be spending their day with someone that wasn't me, or even part of our family. so weird. but i pressed on =)

in scrappy news..i've been working on this ATC swap thing. at least i think thats what its called its over at SIStv , and well i've got about 10 of 30 done lol. i need to get to work on those this weekend..and maybe i'll even post a peek of what i've done with them so far. havent really had any time or energy to scrap much since last week, so maybe i can get some of that squeezed in too since there are so many challenges and online crops going on bc of CHA. can't wait for all the new goodies to come out.

so, i've been so busy with adjusting to me working again, and then our refridgerator broke :( so i've been out and about most evenings trying to find a new one. anyways, the good news is, my new fridge is being delivered tomorrow afternoon and then we can have ice cream again lol.

xoxo

2007-07-11T10:11:00.000-07:00

its been a while since I updated! geesh. I don't think I even realized how long it'd been lol. I think I got thrown off with the mid-week holiday, and then Art had a 5 day holiday after that! Can you imagine having 5 days off in a row? I thought I was going to pull my hair out at one point. Anyways, he's back to work today, and so now I'm working on getting back on schedule =)

I posted some new work over at Crop Addict using the July mid-month kit. It was totally fun and I got lots of stuff done; definitely go check it out! Besides doing those little projects, I haven't really scrapped..I hate feeling like blah! I even went and picked up the new funky vintage line by Making Memories..and its cute and all, just not really inspiring me to bust anything out.

Anyways, I was tagged by Jocelynne like ages ago..so I'm gonna do that now =) My 7 randoms::

I usually count down my birthday..like starting in March. some ppl find that annoying, but whatev! its my birthday and it makes me happy. so 13 days and counting!
my girls usually take baths everyday..but not to get clean lol. they take baths to play. for hours. ahhh. i love my free time!
its pretty rare that i do a layout without my computer on. usually thats because i'm listening to itunes and chatting with kelly.
speaking of kelly..she and i talk almost everyday. we've never met in person, but we've been talking for over a year and half online =)
I never watch tv during the day. even tho its usually on for the girls. they like pbs kids. but when it comes to night time, i'm on it like blue bonnet.
we dont have cable, sad i know. so to get my reality tv fix, i usually watch mtv or vh1 online.
since we dont have cable, you can imagine the amount of infomercials i watch on the weekend. so last week i saw the one for the "Weight Loss Cure" by Kevin Trudeau. He had me sold. Seriously. And then, I went to Amazon to check it out, and read the reviews. yeah. I'm glad I read those. I dont like ppl who lie..but i know that a lot of ppl do to sell their product.

so anyways..those are my randoms. and if you're reading this...consider yourself tagged =)

xoxo

you really do learn something new everyday..

2007-06-27T23:24:00.000-07:00

so last week art and i rented apocalypto, that movie by mel gibson about the mayan culture, sort of. anyways, i didnt really have any interest in seeing it, but i owed art a guy flick, so we watched. anways, in the middle of watching the movie (which btw, is all subtitles. art hated that) i realized something, and made art pause the movie. there was a scene where they were showing a mayan temple, like the one above, with stuff like falling down it. i had no idea what it was. i mean, i always knew that the temples were for some religous matter, duh. but i had no idea that it was for human sacrifice! seriously felt stupid when i asked art if thats what they really were for. i mean, why didnt i learn that in history? anyways, yeah. it was a graphic movie. but i learned something. i have to say tho, that it wasnt nearly as graphic as pan's labryinth. which i only got to see parts of bc my mom called. but thats ok bc art caught me up once i was done.

so today. yeah. i kinda slept through most of it. last night i was complaining to art that i've not been sleeping well and then i remembered that i bought some otc sleeping pills. they usually never worked but i figured i'd give it a try. so i took 2 and decided to play a game online while it kicked in. and man, did it ever kick in. i slept until like after 11. good thing the kids can feed themselves lol. and today art was off..so it was just the beginning of a really lazy day. and i'm sure tomorrow will be similar since he will be home again. i hate that he is home during the week, it throws me off. now dont get me wrong, its nice that hes here, but it really messes with the flow of things around the house.

you know something weird i just realized? that both those movies we watched had subtitles. funny, bc art hates having to read bc he says they go too fast for him. but i love it. for some reason i seem to be able to get more into the movie if i have to read. in fact, when i watch tv i like to have the captions on, altho i usually dont if art is around =)

well i'm hoping to get scrappy tomorrow. i've been avoiding my messy desk the last 2 days. i have kits piling up. thats not a good sign.
xoxo.

yay.

2007-06-21T14:21:00.000-07:00

i finally scrapped! geesh. and i'm blogging. i hope thunder doesnt strike me down ;)
hey guess what? i'm in the catwalk at sistv!! sweet! i probably wouldnt have found out so soon if it werent for anilu.
i was busy outside gardening. or my version of gardening anyways. i have a mini rake, a mini shovel. 2 bags of potting soil and some flowers that needed to be moved. did it happen? not so much. but that could be bc i was out gardening at 10 at night. it was too hot to do it yesterday during the day!
well that and the fact that i was out and about on a mad search for tinkerbell party goods. olivia's 6th bday party is sunday, and her chosen theme is tinkerbell. which would've been fine if i could find a bakery who made tink cakes! i had to go to like 5 different stores. and then dont get me started on the pinata. but the moral of the story is that we now have everything we need for one perfect party. yay.

so today, not doing much besides laundry. its another hot day here and the kids dont want to venture outside. wimps! hehe. just kidding. i wouldnt want to play out there either. :P
happy thursday =)

lots o stuff

2007-06-18T10:35:00.001-07:00

we had a nice and quiet fathers day at our house..slept in a little, then gave art breakfast in bed accompanied by a myriad of cards that the girls made for him. i think it was the perfect morning for him--watching a martial arts movie and just chillaxing. i made that huge tag for him ^^ from the june poppy kit. its so luscious. yum.

saturday art took the girls to a softball game while i went to get my hair cut and colored =) it was looooong overdue and i really love my new look.

i know this isnt the best pic to see my hair and color..but i couldnt resist playing with some new actions that i got on friday lol. anyways, its an A line with side bangs...and the color is like a soft blackish brown. i love it! kinda hard to get used to having bangs! i keep wanting to put them behind my ear, its gonna take some time before i get used to just leaving them be.

anyways, got some other scrappy stuff done on friday, all using the june poppy kit..while my scrapologie is sitting here begging to be played with too! i just can't seem to find enough time. not to mention that i've been scrapping for 2 months with no mojo at all. i hate forcing it..but sometimes i just gotta try to push it through it, kwim? and on that note, i've been thinking about starting another art journal. i saw this one at the RV blog and its just TDF, but i think i'm a little over budget this month on the kit buying grrr. so, i think i might just make my own and try to find some cute fabrics and schtuff locally. i'm hoping that by doing this it'll make me feel creative again..bc i havent felt that way in a while. sigh.

oh, and the actions that i found to play with..which yeah. i need a tutorial in PSE. seriously. i have no idea what i'm doing. i mean, i can get the actions onto my pics--no problem there. its the playing with the opacity (whatever the heck that is! lol) and sharpening etc to get it to look how i want it to. does that make sense? i mean, i'm sure i could figure it out if i could figure out where the hell i find 'opacity'! me thinks i might have to take a trip to the library to learn how to use this program. and i hate that. bc i'm not a patient girl. i want to play NOW. not next week. so..if someone out there can help a girl out..PLEASE! =) oh and i was gonna link to the places i got the actions, bc i had a hard time finding ones that were compatible with PSE and not just PS. jessica's blog is where i bought my first 2 sets. i got all 12 of them for 20 bucks! what a deal! then i checked out this place called optikvervelabs and its actually a free plugin that has all kinds of different conversions. thats actually what i used on that pic of me. anyways, there are a few other ones i found as well, but these are the 2 that i have actually tried so far.

well kiddies .. i'm off to do some laundry. blah.

xoxo

mi vida loca

2007-06-14T14:48:00.000-07:00

so yesterday, i was reading on joce's blog about youtube. i said that i hardly ever use it, bc i know that if i did, i'd be addicted.

so yeah. after i read her post i hopped over there to check it out. i watched a few little clips here and there, and then i was like hm...i wonder if they have this old music video. and they did. so then that led to another and another.. well, you get the picture.

anways. what many ppl dont know about me is that i grew up in california..and i ran with a not so good crowd. gangs and that kind of retarded stuff. anyways my mom moved us here to utah to get me away from that life, and everday that i've been away i've been ever so grateful for the life she gave back to me. so anyways, yesterday i was looking up some old brown pride videos and i remembered this movie that came out in the early 90's, called 'mi vida loca'. and i looked it up on youtube and they had the ENTIRE movie on there. i was surprised to say the least, and so i watched it. anyways..whenever i tell ppl about my past, they can't imagine me living that way, or dressing how i described--and well, this movie summed up what it was like where i grew up. heres the first ten minutes.

summer boredom already??

2007-06-12T12:12:00.000-07:00

its that time of year again. carolyn sitting at my house being bored. i mean, not that we dont have great convo, bc we do. but then i think 'hmm..time to pull out the cam!' and yeah. she hates that. mostly bc i take a bunch of random pics of her and wont let her take any of me. bwaahahah. i'm just evil that way. and i dont feel comfortable in front of the camera--actually thats an understatement. i HATE being in front of it lol. i need to lose like 1 million gagillion pounds, and then i think i will feel better about it.

anyways, the girls are outside enjoying the mild weather, its like 78ish right now. but tomorrow should be closer to 90. yep. time to fill up the pool again. i'm sitting here bored out of mind. and not bc i dont have things to do, bc i certainly always have laundry. blah!

so heres my list of movies that i could watch over and over and over..

return to me--love love the music in this one. such a sweet and funny love story
coyote ugly--i love the music in this one too
when harry met sally--hello, classic!
pretty in pink--bc i was an 80's child and molly ringwald rocks my world.
the holiday--this one is kinda newer. but i've rented it like 3 times already bc i love it so mucho. and yeah, jude law doesnt hurt either.
pretty in pink--julia roberts+richard gere+shopping=perfection!
the goonies--fave kid movie ever possibly. and my kids dig it too

and now..i might go unpack my scrap stuff from the crop i went to on friday. i'm thinking 4 days of it sitting in my totes by my desk might be long enough; but my area looks really clean, and i really dig that lol.

xoxo

the farmers market.

2007-06-09T11:38:00.000-07:00

love this time of year. lots of little things to go do on the weekend.today i met up with some mommies to check out the farmers market that just opened this weekend. it was a perfect morning =)

here are some of pics of what we saw::

i think we could've had a better time if::

the girls werent afraid of clowns on stilts
olivias tummy wasnt upset
i had brought a bag to carry all of our stuff

but at least now i know. oh yeah. and make sure that the girls pee before we leave the house. oh how i hate public restrooms. and the worst part about that is that this park, when not hosting the farmers market, is very well known for being the local transient/drug dealing/have no home area. yeah. but when the market is there its nice. is it funny that i have no pics of actual food?? i wanted to take some pics of some lovely arugala, but i kinda felt weird. plus it was super ass crowded. oh, and my hands were freaking full. duh monica. next time take a bag!!

ooh and i had a delish little coconut cupcake. like a mini size cupcake with like a foot of frosting. maybe it wasnt a foot, but it sure did taste like it. it was soo good. and i also got a chocolate mocha one for later; check this puppy out:

doesnt she look delish? yep. i'm saving her for my middle of the afternoon, mommy needs a moment all to herself, please leave me alone for 2 seconds to think 'time'. lol.

xoxo

happy june!!

2007-06-04T22:08:00.000-07:00

did may fly by or was it just me?? seriously. i think i could settle for a slow down. olivia's bday is only 22 days away...wow. she's gonna be six.

and that little monkey up there is getting registered for pre-k tomorrow! yikes! shes so excited to meet her teacher and to see her classroom for the first time. honestly, i'm excited too. but kinda sad. you know, shes my baby. and i'm gonna bawl like a baby when i take her on the first day and leave her. shes like my shadow, that one. aah. but, on the bright side--i will be getting a couple of hours all to myself! yay! love that.

soo..yeah. nothing new with me. just getting scrappy here and there. my mojo is slowly coming back. i think it helped me to scrap some emotional pages about my mom. i mean..hello i cried all over them. but, it felt good too. oh, and i tried the 6x12 and i dig it. A LOT. now my only dilemma is that i dont have page protectors for that size. so yeah. i'm gonna have to find somewhere that carries them lol. oh well. they will just be sitting pretty on my easel. love it. i think thats about it for me today!!

xoxo

you've got questions...ive got answers

2007-05-31T07:41:00.000-07:00

saw the 20 questions thinger over on anilu's blog and thought it would be fun..

1. regular or diet soda: usually its iced tea. but when i do drink soda, it has to be dr pepper. unless we're at mcdonalds, and then its coke

2. salt or pepper: i'm a pepper girl

3. hot or cold weather: can i say neither? i hate hot or cold. i like a perfect 75.

4. dogs or cats: unless it can poop in the toilet--neither

5. dieting or exercise: exercise. fo shizzle. bc there is no way i'm givin up yummy food

6. cooking or doing dishes: ick neither! if i had it my way we'd have a cook and a maid :P

7. sleeping or shopping: like you have to ask. of course, SHOPPING!

8. Red Lobster or Outback Steakhouse: is it strange that i've never been to either one? if i had to pick i'd pick outback bc i like me a good filet mignon ;)

9. classical or hip hop music: hip hop :)

10. dancing or playing sports: dancing.

11. back rub or foot rub: back rub!

12. fruits or vegetables: fruits!

13. Grey's Anatomy or House: greys! heck yes. love that mcdreamy.

14. coffee or tea: chai tea thank you :D

15. curling up with a good book or a night out on the town: night on the town duh. i can read any ol' time!

16. Straight hair or curly hair: straight. but i have curly hair lol.

17. skirts or shorts: bermuda shorts

18. burgers/hot dogs or Chinese food: lets see. cheeseburgers. and um chili cheese dogs from weinerschnitzel hehe

19. vacationing in Switzerland or Mexico: mexico all the way baby

20. sports car or SUV: bmw x5. or maybe an acura mdx.

Copy, paste and play along!!

feelin like the ick..

2007-05-30T07:12:00.000-07:00

blech. thats how i've been feeling since i got back from cali.
and my mojo is still freakin no where to be found. i hate that.
bc i have this want. this urge to like make something...but i just
cant. and when i try it comes out looking like crap. luckily i squeezed
out that lo up there and i actually kinda digged it. but that could be
more that i liked the person in the pic than the actual lo. do you ever get like that? seems to be happening so much to me lately where i'm just
not satisfied with my work. sigh.

in other news olivia's last day of school is friday! i can't wait to sleep in
till 8. can i get a HOLLA! seriously. sleep is mucho precious to me and i
feel like i get so little.

and ooh yeah. ikea opened here last week. hell yes. i've been of course
salivating over their website for years, but have never stepped foot
into one until last sunday. and man. seriously. the textiles area was
like a feast for my eyes. not so much for my wallet lol. got a few cute things like throw pillows and slipcovers, an apron and some mirrors.
not much else that we 'needed' at the time ha! but i'll be back. oh yes.
bc they have the most awesomest little playroom for the kiddies. and
the girls loved it. now thats what i call shopping!

ok well i'm off to do the laundry thats been screaming at me since i came
home from cali...i've been ignoring it so well, however art is not appreciating that one little bit. ugh. but to wear clean undies IS important so off i go.
xoxo

say what?

2007-05-24T10:14:00.001-07:00

so i've been safely home since monday night..and man. did things ever change over night. my mom called me tuesday afternoon bc she had an appt. with her oncologist about the pathology reports on her tumor.

i knew it was bad by the sound of her voice. but i wasn't expecting what she told me. the dr told her they were wrong. she didnt have ovarian cancer. never did. she has LUNG CANCER. and it spread to her ovaries. they are guessing that she is in the beginning of stage 4. the reason they are 'guessing' is bc they started her chemo yesterday. they are doing a very aggressive treatment and want to get thru it before they stop to do a biopsy. they are really hoping that chemo will shrink the mass in her lung--and will not spread to her brain. but again, we wont know for about a month at least.

anyways..its in god's hands. i was so sad that i couldnt be there with her for her first chemo treatment. but she was super positive about it..and not nearly as scared as i was.

so now about my trip--i didnt throw up on the airplane, so that was awesome lol. but i can honestly tell you that i would be perfectly happy with my life if i never had to fly again! seriously. so lets see..my mom lives in this town called san miguel. and its super small. they are 'famous' for the san miguel mission, which is just beautiful!! and old. i loved that. took lots of pics. oh and i've been so lazy that most of them are unedited..so some of them are crappy. and others i think are just gorgeous :)

this is what you see when you first drive into the town off the freeway.

so this place is pretty old..and monks still live there! would've been cool to be able to go inside, but being that it was sunday they were in the middle of mass. so we just walked around the outside, and then my mom took me over to the cemetary where they bury the monks and i think some fathers (priests) have been buried there too. i got these shots of the cemetary::

some of these arent so good bc i was on the other side of the wall. but i think most came out pretty good. oh, and we went to morro bay..but i'll save those for another post..dont want blogger to kick me out for posting too many pics lol.

so thats it for now..i'm gonna try to clean up this mess on my desk..and maybe even scrap.

xoxo

i'm leavin on a jet plane...

2007-05-18T11:13:00.000-07:00

yep. i'm almost all packed. just need to get my toiletries packed up. i love saying that word. like it almost makes me feel grown up.hehe.

the girls are having a playdate right now so i thought i'd take this

quiet moment to post quickly before i'm off :)

i did this thinger the other day that like distorts/morphs your face..i can't remember what site it was. i should've saved it duh. BUT i did save

the pics to share with you lovlies.

the one up top is me as an ape. gotta love it. i'm actually kinda

cute as an ape, no?

this one is of me as a cartoon. i dig it. i sometimes wish my eyes were that big. certainly would take the focus off of my triple chins!

and i actually really like this one. i look so purdy.

good lord this one is ugly. its me old. but really..its just plain scary. for reals.

ok so thats it for me today. see ya'll next week!!

xoxo

freakin hilarious

2007-05-16T23:29:00.000-07:00

evolution of dance

you.
must.
watch.

hehe. you'll thank me for it later i'm sure.

xoxo

hump day

2007-05-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

and it really feels like it. i'm like wanting this week to go by super slow bc i'm worried sick about flying out on friday. i know thats totally lame--bc i'm way stoked to see my mom and to be kid free for a few days. its just the getting there thats got me freaked. i did a bunch of laundry yesterday so i'd have some options of what to take. and the more i think about it, the more i'm scared! aaaaah! its so annoying. i dont want to be all anxious about flying. which i'm really not. its just that i'm really convinced that i'm going to get lost at LAX. oh and that i think they'll make me check my bag. which i dont want to do. why? bc then that will add one more place i have to find. lol. its so ridiculous that it makes me laugh.

and bc i'm all freaked about flying, i'm trying to occupy my time with scrapping. not really working. but can i just say how much i love poppy ink? mmm. LOVE.

so im sitting here, peaing and i came across the challenge on the GS to scrap about 3 things that dont belong on my desk. as i look around i couldnt find anything really that didnt belong. i mean i have piles. those dont belong. but that is the norm lol. under my piles i found a box of new checks that i forgot i ordered. and i found my lotion that i've been looking for for the last few days. duh. i dont know how it ended up here. but really..everything else belongs. i just wish it were in its place and not in gobs of piles in front of me.

so its nice out. like really nice. like slurpee weather. love those. maybe i'll walk the kiddies over there later to get one. but really what i want to do is scrap. i want to do this bc i have the perfect email in mind. and i want to do this bc i think i have a good pic for it. we'll see. ooh..and its soon to be kelly's bday too. so i need to get her card and schtuff together to send out tomorrow. i was kinda hoping we'd get to meet this weekend since we wont be far from eachother, but i dont know yet if we will. so weird and neat that someone i met a year ago online (2ps) has become part of my daily life. a great friend. :)

xoxo

everyday....

I heard this rumor..

another day in paradise

°missing you°

rAnDoMs

Finally..

.broken hearts suck ass.

always playing catch up

so..

It was winter...

such a slacker

randoms..

once a year..

i know, i know.

dedicated to you, mom

'member? you 'member!

things on my mind as of late

stuff..

uhh..what? **warning..long story**

uh..yeah.

and then..

umm..

day dreaming...

the review..

sharing is caring

lately

because I felt like it..

some randomness..

sooo...

another week passes..

soo..

*tap tap* this thing on?

Good intentions..

just a thought..

so..

current obsessions..

fall is delish

It was lovely

Missing her..

bout time

tgif

here she is..

Procrastination is my middle name

My hands look like hers..

She's gone..

So scared

as promised..

making new habits..or retrieving forgotten ones?

happy early birthday to me..

we did a little of this..

Summertime..

its only been about 2 weeks..

still adjusting..

Chalk art festival

Finally back home

wheeler farm..the experience of a lifetime..

some of the best news ever..

it was a pretty day..

its been about a month..

busy busy busy

i've got a plan

saved by the bell

my civic duty

she KICKED cancer's ass

the best LAUGH ever.

got bored..

looking back..

i actually got it up in time!

hello december..

7 years ago, yesterday

holiday trees

been gettin crafty..

i'm a cherry girl!!!

today

mama said..

once upon a time

need a laugh?

sometimes i cry for no reason

phew!

yeah..we game.

uhh..what? warning..long story

tap tap this thing on?